Right before school let out for winter break, we had a humdinger of an emotional meltdown as Hadley lamented how she absolutely could not perform in her first violin concert that day and gave me an itemized list as to why. (Hating and being horrible at the violin were #1 and 2).
I don’t know how many professional violinists you know but I doubt they were very accomplished after only playing a few months.
Jamie and I tried to console her that she was one of 50 kids performing and she would blend right in but she was irrational and it escalated into a pretty heated disagreement.
Frustrations from the big blowout were not my finest moments so–despite her crazy–I wanted to do something nice for her. She had a sleepover scheduled with her bestie with the caveat her attitude improved, she apologized and she cleaned her room. While she was at school, I did a secret service of the latter item, hoping to surprise her.
Funny No. 1
I was sitting at the kitchen table with Bode when she went to her room.
“Hey wait. My room is all clean! Did Daddy do it? My elf on the shelf?”
Bode whispered to me, “Mommy, was it you?” I responded affirmatively.
“It was Mommy,” he called back. “What do you say to her?”
(Does anyone else find it funny my first grader was trying to coax his older sister to say “thank you?”)
Her response? “I say that I don’t have to clean my room now.”
So much for that little thing called gratitude.
(She eventually did say “thank-you” when she figured out her brother wouldn’t back down until she did. I’m totally hiring the little dude).
Funny No. 2
But back to the dreaded concert. When Jamie and I arrived at school, she was in a much better mood and all seemed forgotten.
Her beloved music teacher Mr. V did a wonderful job and the little performers far exceeded expectations…earplugs weren’t even needed! Hadley was mostly hidden from my view on the second row but I listened intently for a rogue violinist and breathed a sigh of relief when it was all over.
Me: “Hadley, you did a great job!”
Her: “I didn’t play.”
Me: “What do you mean? I saw you playing.”
Her: “I just pretended to play. I moved my bow around but didn’t touch the strings. I was too afraid of messing up.”
I LAUGHED OUT LOUD. This is not the first time she has done this.
Funny No. 3
When Hadley was two years old, the Primary (young) kids at church were singing a couple of songs dedicated unto the dads for Father’s Day. Hadley was in what is called Nursery; kind of the preschool to the Big Primary Kahuna. The kids were singing her favorite song: “I’m so glad when Daddy comes home,” a little ditty she had been singing since she could barely talk. I hesitated, wondering if my little social butterfly would be ill-at-ease performing a song she’d never practiced in front of huge congregation. So I simply asked if she’d like to sing it with the big Primary kids. The response?
Ohhhhh yeah!
In fact, she could barely sit still leading up to her debut performance. I even tried to do a practice run as a refresher but she got mad, saying she wasn’t going to sing it now. Silly me.
When it came time, she practically skipped to the front of the chapel and plopped herself front and center. And as if expecting all eyes should naturally fall upon her, she prepared herself to perform.
The only problem was that I failed to tell her they were singing two songs, the first of which she did not know.
The music started and for a moment, Hadley faltered. She cautiously looked around as if thinking, “This was NOT in my contract.” But while the other young children either looked bored out of their minds or like a deer in headlights, the Hurricane took a different approach.
“She is…she is…she is….” Jamie laughingly faltered.
“What? What is she doing?”
“She is lip-syncing the words!” he finally spewed out.
Sure enough, my little Hurricane was faking it, evidently so as not to disappoint her publics.
But the best reaction of all was when the second song came on, her song. She immediately perked up, SHOUTED the words, and acted out the actions such as “put my arms around his neck, hug him tight like this.” The kid gave an Oscar-worthy performance.
When it came time to “give him a great, big kiss,” Jamie and I were about ready to pee our pants as she dramatically swept out her arm and blew him a smoocher.
She was so proud of herself and had no idea that she, the youngest kid up there, had left the entire ward in stitches. And had made the biggest, funniest, cutest fool of herself imaginable.
So, the moral of the violin-faking story? There is always hope.
I'm a Canadian-born mom of two, former Denver Post columnist, family travel writer, editor of MileHighMamas.com and 9News contributor. Expert on all things Utah, Denver, family and travel. Lover of laughter and life. Happily married to a man obsessed with growing The Great Pumpkin. 