I’m frequently asked about my happy outlook on life. Though a lot of what we encounter is really tough (like our 2011), I’m a firm believer in the following principles:
1) Gratitude
Some of the least grateful people I know are also the unhappiest. This is true of both my single and married friends. I was 30 when I married Jamie, which is an Old Maid in Mormon Years. I didn’t care. Though I wasn’t making a ton of money, I was passionate about what I was doing. I had a full life, fantastic career, traveled extensively and dated a lot. Carpe diem!
On the other hand, I had dear friends who were thoroughly depressed their plans to marry and have kids had not worked out at that point. But they didn’t do anything about it and instead chose to mope around and not put themselves in situations where they were developing their passions and therefore themselves.
There’s nothing attractive about someone who’s not doing anything with their life. And guess what:
Lesson learned: Don’t feel sorry for yourself.
2) Action
Take that gratitude and run with it.
I’m a firm believer we are all given talents that are unique to us. Something I am ardent about instilling in my kids: do not wait for life to happen to you. I want them to be confident in their skills, able to accept defeat and actively live their lives without ever saying, “I’ll be happy when….”
Learn to be happy NOW and:
3) Resist envy and comparing yourself to others.
I’m giving a talk in church next weekend and I came across this awesome quote from Elder Jeffrey Holland at last weekend’s General Conference:
There are going to be times in our lives when someone else gets an unexpected blessings or receives some special recognition. May I plead with us not to be hurt — and certainly not to feel envious — when good fortune comes to another. We are not diminished when someone else is added upon. We are not in a race against each other to see who is the wealthiest or the most talented or the most beautiful or even the most blessed.
4). Which leads me to…religion. I’ve always been very forthcoming about my religious affiliation and I laugh in the face of most of the self-help gurus because so many “life coaches” don’t have a clue. The best way to connect with yourself is through God in a deep, meaningful way. Whether or not they know it, people need to believe in something. If you don’t have answers, actively seek them out. This one is too important to procrastinate. P.S. Go here for an inspiring 1-minute Easter video about Christ’s final hours.
4) Repeat after me: I am amazing. A friend who has struggled with debilitating depression told me part of her therapy has been to completely change the way she thinks. When a negative, self-loathing thought comes to her mind (i.e. “You’re so stupid for not being able to do that”), she is to stop and completely change her mind pattern.
I’m so proud of her progress in realizing her true potential and how valuable she really is.
My parting thought is this HILARIOUS video that I swear could be my offspring.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qR3rK0kZFkg]
And don’t you ever forget it.
I'm a Canadian-born mom of two, former Denver Post columnist, family travel writer, editor of MileHighMamas.com and 9News contributor. Expert on all things Utah, Denver, family and travel. Lover of laughter and life. Happily married to a man obsessed with growing The Great Pumpkin. 