I can’t say I’ve ever posted a YouTube music video but the words to this song by Christian musician Laura Story hit me right where it counts.

“What if your blessings come in raindrops, what if your healing comes in tears…what if trials of this life are your mercies in disguise….”

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGniRk_GcLs?hd=1]

It reminded me to have perspective and of something I originally wrote for Mile High Mamas two years ago that I’ll repost as I count my blessings, particularly this special time of year.

==========

My husband Jamie has been cancer-free for 12 years.

He had recently graduated from college and had started his own consulting firm when a lump starting forming on his neck. It disappeared after a week but night-sweats and flu-like symptoms emerged. And then the lump returned.

He tried a few home remedies to no avail and finally sought medical attention. After Jamie described his symptoms, the doctor said, “I think it could be either mono or cancer. And I don’t think it is cancer.”

He was wrong.

Jamie was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Disease, cancer of the lymph nodes. When detected early, the survival rate is 80%. Like all cancers, later-stage prognosis is deadly. He was single, without insurance and living in Utah, far away from his family.

His doctor told him to apply for Medicaid. He was initially denied. Miraculously, he was eventually able to get on programs for which she should not have qualified and his medical expenses were covered.

But then came his personal expenses. No longer able to work, Jamie faced a very bleak, daunting future. Amidst all this turmoil, he received a call from Tom Sawyer, an influential local businessman. Tom had risen above a horrific childhood to play football for LSU, become an engineer, work on the Eagle Lander for NASA, and by accident got into politics and landed in the White House as a trusted aide for Presidents Nixon and Reagan.

He is also a cancer survivor.

Jamie had met him only once before as they both assisted their Japanese friend Yodi with becoming an American citizen.

Tom invited Jamie to his office and upon arrival said, “Jamie, let me be straight with you. I hear you need some help. Tell me about your situation.” Jamie reluctantly divulged his circumstances, to which Tom queried, “How much do you need to get through the next month?”

Initially, Jamie refused but then realized this was an answer to prayers and he gave him a number. Tom told him to come by his office the next day and he would give him a check. The next day, Jamie showed up and Tom handed him a check for twice the amount they had discussed. Jamie pointed this out to him and he brusquely said, “Yeah, I know.”

The pattern persisted. Each month, Tom called Jamie to his office. Each conversation ended the same: “Come into my office tomorrow and I will have a check waiting for you.” This lasted the duration of his chemotherapy and radiation treatments and Jamie’s cancer has never returned.

Last week, I had moments of serious refection as people very close to me suffered deeply. With immense gratitude, I looked at my life, my marriage, my children, my home. I looked at the path we have taken. It has rarely been smooth or perfect. Times may be tough but we are fortunate to not be riddled with debt and recognize the miracles we have experienced to bring us where we are today.

This time of year, millions of people celebrate Easter as a time of resurrection and new beginnings.

Today, I am grateful for two men who gave us ours.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog

Things are kinda stressed ’round these parts.

Thankfully, it’s nothing health-related but we’re at a crossroads with Jame’s web development business, Pixo Web Design and Strategy. We’re busting at the seams. He has built up a great client base and we can’t keep up with everything.

That should be a good thing, right?

The thing is, we’re working around-the-clock and are at a crossroads. We need to expand and hire help but it’s a scary proposition when we’ve been using the safety net of just commissioning freelancers. And hiring employees means less money for us when we’re already stretched thin so that means raising prices and….

Can someone please explain to me how people run their own business without having a nervous breakdown? We are lucky we’ve turned a profit almost from the very moment Jamie started Pixo and his skills have proven he is a force to be reckoned with. But three years later, we are in dire need of sitting down with someone to draft up a solid business plan.

You know: the kind where you sell off the business a few years down the line for millions of dollars and retire in your early-40s. Anyone got a plan like that?

One of the keys for us is to get more clients on a monthly retainer so we’re not scrambling every month to cover those who don’t pay on time, sites that get delayed, etc. And Jamie found two great ones for us but the problem is I need to run the campaigns. ‘Lil ol’ me who is already running around with my head cut off working all hours of the morning and night, juggling kids, household, church and more.

I had a complete meltdown the other night. Jamie handled it well. He lovingly listened to me and offered to take it all away, which helped me see that he needs this. We need this. We both need to step up the next several months to make this work, to make it grow.

What kills me the most is I wish I could freeze time with Haddie and Bode. They’re at such delightful ages–no longer dependent babies and are beginning to truly blossom into the people they were born to be.

Sometimes I just miss the days when they were little and I scrambled to fill my 15-hour days. Would I take Haddie hiking? Would Bode and I go to storytime? Every day, I desperately needed to get out of the house to do something with them, even if it was just for walk around the neighborhood.

These days, if I get even that I am lucky.

Breathe deeply. My therapy will be posting about this summer’s Great Canadian Road Trip next time.

A momentary reprieve is just around the corner….

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog