Just when you think you know someone

February 29, 2012 By

Part of the joys of being self-employed is dealing with your own insurance nightmares. Due to Jamie’s medical history, he’s not exactly a desirable candidate (understatement) and so we’re paying an exorbitant amount in medical insurance.

And unfortunately that medical insurance does not include dental.

So it’s been a good, long while since any of us have gone to the dentist. Jamie has been harping on me to make an appointment for the kids and I’ve been looking around for the best deals because we’ll have to pay out-of-pocket.

Then yesterday, Bode came home with a toothbrush from school. Turns out a pediatric dentist had visited them and was offering a free new-patient visit.

Jamie: Call TODAY and make an appointment.
Me: OK, OK. I’ll leave a message at Dr. Savage’s office.
Jamie: (Long pause) Dr. Savage? His first name isn’t Rick, is it?
Me: (Wracking my brain for recognition). No, it isn’t. Why?
Jamie: Because Rick Savage is my rock star name.

Is it just me or is having an imaginary rock star working on your mouth a wee bit unsettling?

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor, Jamie

On firing your husband

February 28, 2012 By

This blog is woefully in need of some TLC and a complete overhaul (including rebranding and switching to WordPress). Jamie has been helping with the redesign in his spare time, which means it’s barely happened because the dude is always working.

But on Sunday, I convinced him that his day of rest was best spent helping me.

Something about service to your fellow (wo)man.

He reluctantly agreed and started searching around for a new logo. This is what he proposed.
Looks like I’m in the market for another web designer.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor, Jamie, pumpkins

Parenting Perils and Perks

February 16, 2012 By

Though busy, busy, busy, we’re having a batch of really good days around here with even better attitudes from the kids.

Believe me, we’ve had enough bad ones to recognize a ray of sunshine when it happens.

However as all parents will attest, parenting is just exhausting. Though I can keep up with my kids on the best of days, sometimes I just need a break, some alone time and you know what? They’re always there, clamoring for my attention and pulling me in so many different ways.

Then I remind myself these are the precious years and I wouldn’t have it any other way because pretty soon, they’ll be ignoring me.

However, on one of my fragmented nights after we put the kids to bed, I started to confess to Jamie: “Here’s the hard thing about parenting….” and before I could continue, he responded.

“The kids.”

That pretty much sums it up.

==========================

When Bode says his nighttime prayers, he often rattles off a long list of items and body parts for which he is grateful. Following a recent prayer, I asked: “Bode, did you just thank Heavenly Father for TVs?”

“Yes,” he confirmed. “In the olden days they didn’t have them.”

Can’t argue with his logic…or gratitude.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Humor, Jamie

Our Anniversary Love Story

February 15, 2012 By

It’s official: Jamie and I have been an old, married couple for NINE years!

In keeping with tradition, I’ll share my courtship story with Jamie. Y’see, my beloved James and I were BYU students at the same time, graduated from the same department, walked through the same graduation ceremonies and regularly played volleyball together on the same court one summer…and yet never met.

It took a glorious thing called the Internet to finally bring us together many years later. I was in the midst of terminating an on-again, off-again five-year long-distance relationship and was cruising a popular Mormon singles site, adding unsuspecting prey to my Little Black Book.

Jamie had also ended a relationship a few months prior and was looking for some nice local Mormon girls to date. I, however, was not local. (Or nice for that matter; really, my only qualifier was I was Mormon). He was in Denver, I in Salt Lake City. I had just endured a long-distance romance and vowed I would never do that again. That avowal lasted about a week. He, too had no interest in something long distance.

Despite the odds, I came across his profile. It was not his dashing good looks that initially struck me (his photo was taken on an Alaskan glacier five miles away) or his poetry and prose (i.e. “I like eating good food”) but rather the strong impression that I needed to write him. Immediately.

Our connection was immediate. Jamie first knew it was love when I expounded upon mountaineering and the definition of the horned sacrificial altar in Ancient Israel (yep, we’re two of a kind). I knew Jamie was The One when he googled my name and read every single article I had ever written. Either that or he was a stalker. Fortunately, he proved to be the former.

After countless e-mails and phone calls over the next two months, we planned to meet. By this time, it had been revealed to both of us in a very powerful way that we would get married. Imagine, if you will, how you’d feel opening the door to a person you’d never laid eyes on, yet knowing he was The One. Suffice it to say, the week prior to our meeting, I was a wreck.

Another confirmation I received was when The Family Curse came upon me. Y’see, when both of my brothers met their spouses, something unfortunate always happened. For Patrick, he “accidentally” passed gas when he was introduced to Jane. For Jeek, he had developed a horrible boil smack in the middle of his nose when he met Shannon. For me, I developed an allergic reaction to some flowers at work, which resulted in a stye in my eye. Y’know. The really pink, pussy, ugly kind. This was yet another sign.

And so despite my pussy, makeup-less state when I finally laid eyes on him (albeit one good eye), I knew then what I know now: that we were meant to be together. And despite all my Murphyisms and idiosyncrasies, he still loves me. And keeps loving me. I don’t understand or question it, I’m just grateful for it.

Happy Anniversary, Honey!

(To read all the sordid details of our wedding day, go here).

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor, Jamie, Marriage

The Boy Conspiracy

January 24, 2012 By

Haddie is in the middle of what we hope will be her final round of swim lessons before she tries swim team. The schedule is later than I would like and we don’t arrive home until 6:30 p.m.

Our family thinks they are going to die if we don’t eat by 6 p.m. Anyone else seeing a problem here?

Though Jamie is great in the kitchen, I do 99% percent of the cooking and I’m hesitant to ask him for help because he’s so darn busy. But one night, I didn’t have a chance to prepare anything so asked him if he and Bode could be in charge of warming up leftovers so dinner would be ready when we walked in the door.

They both agreed and I was charmed to arrive home to both boys in aprons.

They even had flour on their faces and apparently had been working hard.

Or not.

There in the middle of the kitchen table was a pizza that looked suspiciously like it was purchased from Domino’s.

“Where did you buy the pizza?”
“We made that pizza. What do you think we’ve been doing the past hour?”
“Bode, be honest with Mommy. Did you make that pizza?”
“Yes, what Daddy said. We’ve been working hard!”

Gotta give the boys credit: they stuck to their story and I almost started believing them until I found the pizza box outside in the garbage.

Here’s a tip for the boy conspiracy for next time: destroy all evidence.

And do Pizza Hut next time.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Humor, Jamie

The Day I Thought We Were Going to Die–Part II

January 13, 2012 By

If you’re just tuning in, be sure to first read The Day I Thought We Were Going to Die, Part I.

So, where were we? Right. The Wyoming freeway was closed due to snow, wind and suicidal conditions and my dear husband came up with an alternate route.

I will never again trust his “alternate routes” without thorough research.

“Look here!” he pointed to his iPhone’s GPS. Let’s just take Route 14, which runs kind of parallel to I-90, connect with Route 16 and then cut back down to Buffalo. Then, we’ll be able to get back on the freeway.”

Several cars were heading in that direction so I figured it would be fine.

What was not fine was Plan B.

“Let’s keep calling the WY road conditions. If I-90 opens up, we’ll take North Piney Road back to the freeway.”

Can’t see North Piney Road on this map? That is because it is too small and sketchy to even be included. (It’s located north of Lake de Smet).

As we followed the caravan of cars along Highway 14, conditions were blustery but plowed and drivable. When we reached the turnoff for North Piney Road, I learned via WY’s road hotline that the freeway had reopened. “Let’s do it!” Jamie announced.

But then I spotted North Piney, which was the very definition of remote. Dread enveloped my body. As Jamie tried to turn off, we started sliding, almost causing an accident and augmenting my alarm.

“Let’s just keep going on Highway 14.” I begged. “This just feels wrong.” But Jamie was already en route. Within a couple of minutes, North Piney’s conditions worsened. Only one truck had dared to traverse the deep snow earlier that morning and Jamie attempted to follow its tracks on the unplowed road.

Yes, I did say attempted.

My coping skills were nonexistent as I replayed a television special where a young family got lost and then stuck in the snowy Oregon mountains after accidentally taking an abandoned service road. After several days, the father James Kim left his stranded family to seek help..and was found dead in a canyon.

I played it out in my mind. I would go for help. I was the Canuck. I was strong. I liked snow. I took a mental note of the few farmhouses we passed, determining they would be our lifeline.

And then we got stuck and all plans went out the window. I freaked. And cried. We didn’t have anything to dig us out and the road was A-B-A-N-D-O-N-E-D. To Jamie’s credit, he was calm as we rocked back and forth, eventually surging forward.

For the first time, Hadley looked up from watching a movie and clued into her surroundings. “THEY NEED TO PLOW THIS ROAD!!!!!”

Gee, you think?

We miraculously made it to I-90. “I didn’t think we were going to get out of there,” Jamie later confessed. And then I thanked him for waiting to tell me. Someone needed to keep it together.

That wasn’t the end of our troubles. We heard more reports the freeway was closed again in Casper, WY and Denver had its own problems with closures due to high winds. Casper was still two hours away so I prayed we wouldn’t have to spend New Year’s Eve stuck in Wyoming.

I started to make calls to local hotels just in case. When we arrived in Casper, freeway closure signs abounded. As we started surrendering to the inevitable, a miracle happened: in a decidedly Parting of the Red Sea-esque moment, the freeway reopened at the exact moment we arrived.

Just call us Moses. Or Aaron. Heck, Children of Israel works, too.

We squeaked into Denver that night several hours later than anticipated. I grabbed a bucket of KFC, toasted the New Year via last year’s Ball Drop on YouTube and was contentedly passed out by 9:30 p.m.

And there’s no way I would have rather ended a decidedly crummy 2011 than snuggled up in my own bed.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Family travel, Hadley, Jamie

New Year’s Resolution Failure

January 2, 2012 By

2011 was a rough year medically for Jamie. If it wasn’t his heart problems, he had a constant barrage of rheumatism attacks, resulting in many sleepless and painful nights.

Between his unrelenting work schedule, bad health and The Great Pumpkin, I felt like a single mom for much of last year. Sunday (New Year’s Day), he went home from church early due to stomach pains. When the kids and I returned home and I saw him doubled over on the couch, I sympathetically proposed a solution.

“I’ll tell you what, Jamie. How about for 2012 you make the resolution to STOP BEING SICK?”

Pause…before I continued.

“Oh wait. It’s January 1 and you’ve already broken that resolution.”

Here’s for hoping (and praying) for a better year for him.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Health, Jamie

Snowmamas SnowFun in Park City

December 28, 2011 By

To say these last weeks have been crazed would be an understatement.

There was the Snowmamas Summit early-December at Park City Mountain Resort. To see the fun article I wrote about how I would spend 72 hours in Park City, be sure to go here.

We cowboy karaoked at Cisero’s wherein it was confirmed if you do not sing, dance or at least drink you have NO BUSINESS performing. Fortunately my talents lie elsewhere like careening down Gorgoza Park’s suicidal tubing hill.

We also race down the alpine coaster and were among the first to try Park City Mountain Resort’s brand spankin’ new Flying Eagle Zip line. I’m really excited about this addition because it’s a great starter zipline for my kids to try in March (there is a 42″ minimum height requirement).

Maggie and I were the first of the Snowmamas to test it out and the ending is a bit startling (and loud), hence our expressions.
In case you were wondering: startling + me = a bad mix.

I skied the first day with the group but it was my first time on skis since my knee surgery and I woke up sore the next day. I opted to skip out and explore Park City, starting on Main Street and then hiking up Daly Canyon as I passed numerous historic mining sites. When the plowed road turned to deeper snow, I thought, “This could end badly.”
That is not the first time I’ve ever harbored that sentiment.

Fortunately, it was a glorious hike and great to have some much-needed alone time at a haunt only known to the locals.

Jamie called me during my hike.

Him: How’s it going?
Me: Good. Knee was a bit sore so I opted out of skiing today.
Him: That’s good. So, what are you doing?
Me: Going snow hiking.
Him: It is just me or does that not make any sense?
Me: It’s just you. So, what are you doing?
Him: It’s been snowing non-stop in Denver so the kids and I were going to go sledding.
Me: You mean that kid with the busted arm?
Him: (Ignoring me): It took me about a half hour to bundle them up in their ski clothes. I then had to climb up into the rafters in the garage to grab the sled. Bode was down below and told me to drop it down so he could catch it.
Him: You mean that kid with the busted arm?
Him: (Ignoring me): So I dropped it down, he grabbed it, hurt his arm even more so we didn’t go sledding after all.

It’s kind of worrisome when I (the one hiking with the sore knee)am the only one making sense in this family.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Family travel, Humor, Jamie, Utah

How Bob made a liar out of me

December 15, 2011 By

I need to preface this post by saying Jamie is an upstanding, honest guy.

Usually.

But apparently he has weaknesses, as was recently evidenced when a certain massage chain started calling him in November. Only they weren’t calling him, they were asking Bob. Jamie repeatedly told them Bob did not live here but it was our phone number and our address in the computer under Bob Johnson. And a load of pre-paid massages.

Shortly before Jamie’s birthday, they called him again telling him that he (a.k.a. Bob) hadn’t had a massage in months and his credits were about to expire.

Jamie explained the mix-up but the therapist didn’t care who took them. “Well, someone needs to use these up by the end of the year.”

And so Bob did. Or at least Jamie did in his name. Yep, that’s right people. For Jamie’s 41st birthday, he treated himself to a massage (or in his words, “a birthday miracle”). When he arrived at his appointment, he hung out in the waiting room for a while when the therapist called his name. And then called it again. Suddenly, Jamie tuned in. They were calling for Bob. “That’s ME!!!!” he said not-so convincingly.

I thought this little trespass was behind us until that same massage chain called me last week asking for (who else) Bob.

“Bob isn’t available,” I carefully said.
“Well, tell him there is a problem with the appointment he made on Saturday. His favorite therapist Cara isn’t available.”
“Oh.”
“So, what should we do? Switch him to another therapist?”
“Um, I’m not sure.”
“Well, if we don’t hear back from Bob we’ll assume that’s OK.”
“Sounds good.”

Looks like the real Bob will be in for a little surprise when he shows up for his appointment this weekend.

And I didn’t even get a massage out of it.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor, Jamie

They Say It’s *His* Birthday!

December 9, 2011 By

Today is Jamie’s birthday.

Since No. 41 is considerably less climactic than 40, our celebrations have been relatively low-key. He has a youth temple trip tonight so we celebrated yesterday at The Keg Steakhouse. I was thrilled when this top-notch Canadian chain opened in Denver a couple of years ago.


Because if there’s anything my fellow cow-townies know, it’s good beef.

(Insider tip: Sign up for their email list and you’ll receive a coupon for a free steak dinner during your birthday month).

Jamie and I were originally going to do a date night to see a movie and then go to dinner but when that fell through, we opted to bring the kids along.

Mostly because it was cheaper to bring them to the restaurant than pay for a sitter.

Children = opportunity cost.

Happy birthday to my handsome, loving, hilarious and hard-working Pumpkin Man!

XOXOX

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: birthday, Jamie
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