The End of an Era

April 12, 2011 By

Part of my household purge has been getting rid of furniture and toys the children no longer use. I sold Haddie’s Fisher Price princess trunk and bookshelf on Craiglist and hope to save up some money to buy her a more grown-up desk and hutch for her birthday.

Grandparents, take note. :)

One item I was sad to part with was our Thomas the Trainset. We have a long history with Thomas. When Hadley was 2 years old, she drew blood at Toys R Us over her refusal to leave Thomas behind. It got so bad that she had to be personally escorted out of the store by the manager. Jamie wrote about it on the blog he created to counter my “lies”: Crazy Canuck: The Truth Set Free.

That’s another phase I’m glad has come and gone.

Though I can’t say his pumpkin blog, Denver Pumpkins, is much better.

(On a related note, be sure to “like” him on his newly-created Facebook page The Pumpkin Man for updates on the pumpkin’s growth and the air date of a certain network show we’ll be on.)

But back to Thomas. We ended up buying the current train track off of Craiglist and surprised her with it for Christmas. One of my fondest memories was watching her chubby little legs race over to it for the first time. Both she and Bode spent hours playing with dear Thomas until he went into early retirement last year.

I posted the train track on Craiglist and we sold it on Monday. After the sale, with the fondness of a mother far-removed from the trauma, I told Hadley about when she made her blood pact with Thomas at Toys R Us. I don’t know what I expected: Horror or embarrassment about her reaction, perhaps? But certainly not this:

“Well, didn’t you buy it for me?”

How far she has come.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Hadley, Humor, Jamie

Intervention: A Mother’s Tale of Its Triumphs and Sorrows

April 11, 2011 By

Are you familiar with Intervention, the disturbing A&E show where people confront their addictions with the help of their friends and families through drug and alcohol intervention?

Last week, I staged an intervention. For myself.

My catalyst was a visit with my dear friend Stephanie in California over Spring Break. She is admittedly obsessive about tidiness and the result is a beautiful, orderly home.

And then I returned to mine.

While I get a passing grade for cleanliness I am a beauty-school dropout as it pertains to organization. Before my bags were even unpacked, I resolved to make a change. I started by moving our storage cubby of toys in the family room upstairs to the children’s bedroom, ridding the entire main level of toys. What I didn’t post on Craiglist, I donated to A.R.C, recycled or threw in the trash.

But it didn’t stop there. Our home has limited storage space and the root of our problems can be found in
The Room of Doom. Most houses have one. You know: the place where you dump every random object you can’t be bothered to put away. Ours is our storage room. When we finished our basement two years ago, it became the resting ground for not only food items but building materials, party favors and the odd cat or two.

My husband and I have been resolving to clean it for several months so I decided I would surprise him by tackling the onerous task myself. How delighted he would be to arrive home to such a great surprise! It wasn’t easy but I was a woman on a mission. After several hours, the difference was staggering.

The Shameful Before:

The Glorious After:

Jubilantly, I hauled numerous items to the garbage and loaded two overflowing donation bags in the trunk of my SUV. There was another large bag near our front door so I decided to close the garage door and haul the other bag from the front.

The only problem is I had forgotten that I had left the trunk of my SUV open.

An open trunk + a closed garage door = a scenario you do not want to envision.

Let’s just say my husband held a different kind of Intervention when he returned home.

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED AT MILEHIGHMAMAS.COM.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor

I know he’s driving me nuts!

April 6, 2011 By

Bode is going through an extremely annoying phase. Everything he says has to be prefaced by, “Do you know something?”

And I mean everything.

My responses are varied but usually I say, “Yes, I know everything.” Undaunted, he blabbers on. The other day, he and his BFF Seanie had an entire conversation that had to be prefaced with “do you know something” each time they spoke.

It was the longest playdate ever.

Jamie hit his limit the other day when Bode was trying to get his attention.

Bode: “You know something?”

Jamie: “Stop saying that! Just say ‘Hey Daddy.’”

Bode: “OK. Hey Daddy, do you know something?”

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Humor, Jamie

Kids say the darndest things (what are yours saying?

April 4, 2011 By

Oh. My. Gosh. I think someone should write a book on the funny things that kids say. My friend Becky posted this hilarious vignette based on a conversation she had with her 3-year-old daughter, Rosie:

“Rosie drew a picture of a mountain this morning. I asked her what the name of the mountain was. She said ‘Rocky Mountain PBS Kids.’”

My friend Dave’s 5-year-old daughter Sienna said this to her friend during their carpool: “There are a lot of Santas. I even saw one in Seattle.”

The other day, I overheard my 4-year-old son Bode, exasperated at waiting for Hadley, say: “1, 2, don’t make me say 3!!!”

I have no idea where he learned that. :)

Here’s another one. In order to get anywhere on time CLICK TO READ ON AT MILEHIGHMAMAS.COM

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor

A Great Inheritance

March 31, 2011 By

Jamie and I reattempted the steep hike that was the catalyst for his heart surgery last month.

He did marvelously.

It was so wonderful to be on a date together doing what we love most. We talked about work projects as well as brainstormed ideas for future collaborations.

We also talked about the kids. I saw the Garfield movie on an endcap at Target for $5 and bought it for Haddie’s birthday. She has been harassing me about it for weeks, citing the last time she saw Garfield was years ago. She is able to recount the most freakishly specific details about what she was doing when she saw it.

Then, we talked about Bode. I continue to be impressed with how even-keeled he is. I can count on one hand how many temper tantrums he has had (whereas Haddie lived in timeout when she was 2 and 3). When I have his friends over, I am reminded of just how easy-going, agreeeable and mature he is.

Jamie acknowledged both.

“That Haddie, she has an amazingly keen memory like me,” Jamie boasted.

I agreed.

“And Bode,” he continued, “He inherited his dad’s wisdom and depth.”

I didn’t discount any of it but I wanted in.

“So, what did they inherit from me?” I queried, preparing myself for an outpouring of my good graces.

Long pause.

“They inherited your round head.”

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, hiking, Humor, Jamie

Telluride Ski Resort’s Offerings & Why Eco Adventures is the Road That Should be Taken

March 30, 2011 By

Telluride Ski Resort has created a road-less-traveled impasse for families: Register the kids in ski school and conquer the terrain of Colorado’s most awe-inspiring resort.

–OR–

Enroll in Eco Adventures, a one-stop adventure shop designed to connect the entire family to the surrounding Telluride region.

Ever the fence sitters, my family did both. And sorry, Mr. Browning, our indecision made all the difference.

Eco Adventures for Kids

While most of Colorado’s resorts focus their efforts solely on ski and ride school, Telluride’s Eco Adventures offers an unparalleled opportunity to try a compendium of activities while learning about area ecosystems.

Prior to our trip, I sat Hadley (6) and Bode (4) down to review their many class choices that include identifying animal tracks, constructing energy kits, making snow caves, building their own snowshoes, learning about local plants and animals or discovering how skating is possible. Prices start at $25 for potty-trained children 3 and older.

After careful consideration, my children opted for The Bucktooth Builders ($50) where they would hike to a real beaver dam and also Cool Kitchen Science ($60) that included creating weird experiments that included making goop and a pickle glow.

Basically, it was kid heaven.

After introducing Hadley and Bode to their instructor Lexi, they forgot about my existence as they delved into the environmental center’s animal skulls (including black bear, bobcat, elk and mountain goat), dress-up pelts, plants, insects, cool science experiments, and so much more.

That’s my way of saying I had no idea what most of it was.

By day’s end, they were a database of knowledge. Bursting with exuberance, they showed me their science experiments (complete with a hypothesis and conclusion) and downloaded everything I’ve ever wanted to know about beavers. They had snowshoed for the first time to a beaver dam and made their own buck teeth and tail out of cardboard.

If it wasn’t so endearing it would have been a wee bit disturbing.

Eco Adventures is conveniently located in the Mountain Village near the base of the lifts and is open 9 a.m.- 5 p.m. year-round. Don’t miss their summer programs that include Kids Programs for kids ages 3 and up and their full-day adventure camps for ages 5-12. Half- and full-day custom excursions area also available for the entire family. 970-728-7300, ecoadventures@tellurideskiresort.com

Eco Adventures for Grown-up Kids

Eco Adventures doesn’t just cater to children and offers adults ice climbing, heli-skiing, Nordic ski, snowcat skiing and fly fishing.

While my kids were happily exploring their environs, this mama took to the trails in Eco Adventures’ guided snowshoe tour. For just $45, my group of five received loaner Atlas snowshoes and rode to the top of lift 10.

I enjoy the solitude of solo snowshoeing so was a bit wary of sharing my backcountry spoils. My concerns were quashed as our guide, Warner Paige, unleashed geology in action. We wound through a conifer forest heavily blanketed in snow along the resort’s TopAten Snowshoe and Nordic Area (which offers 10 kilometers of trails).

We frolicked in the glistening Magic Meadow, identified dizzying 14,000 peaks in the Wilson Range, chuckled at John Wayne Stories, spotted lynx and snowshoe hare tracks, saw celebrity cabins, and had our breath taken at every turn. After two hours with Warren, I had an intimate knowledge and appreciation for the region.

Though it doesn’t take much to appreciate views like this.

Why Telluride?

When I told many friends I was going to Telluride, their response was always “why?”

The magnificence of the sky-scratching panoramas that meld into red-rock mesas are not in question but rather, their proximity to Denver (a six-hour drive).

The reasons are simple: beauty, services and more beauty.

This southwestern resort is not a quick weekend trip, it is a destination. After a mere few days, my family was wooed by Telluride’s western charm, the Mountain Village’s sleek European-style amenities and the free gondola (the first and only of its kind) that connects them both.

The Mountain

Jamie and I fell in love with Telluride Mountain Resort’s 1,700 skiable acres, which offer something for everyone. Though we missed eight inches of fresh powder that had fallen a few days prior and conditions were really tracked out, getting around was simple and fluid. We were able to easily access the entire mountain from one end to the other in just one morning. Jamie hiked and skied down expert terrain in reputed Prospect Bowl while I opted for more sane choices off the Polar Queen Express.

To each his or her own.

Telluride is also a great beginner’s mountain and my children flourished in Telluride Ski School. While most novices are relegated to trails near the base with limited views, anyone can access the top of Prospect Express (lift 12). It is one of the four highest lifts at the resort and has a 13,320-foot peak looming over the ridge. Best of all, the entire family can ski down green-level Galloping Goose, the longest run at Telluride Ski Resort.

Stay

The Peaks Grand Heritage Resort & Spa is about as good as it gets for family travel. Perks include ski-in ski-out access, 161 guest rooms, a Kids Camp for ages two and over as well as private daycare. Your kids will love Telluride’s only water slide that spills into an indoor and outdoor heated swimming pool, moms are pampered at the world-class spa and everyone will relish the live music on the heated decks that offer the best après ski vibes in town.

Eats

For on-mountain dining, we ordered in Crazy Elk Pizza one night and chowed down on Hop Garden’s delicious burgers another evening (both at the resort’s base).

Another delight was riding the free gondola into town and eating at The Sweet Life, the sweetheart of family dining. While I can’t say I recommend the dinner menu (our items were overcooked), this candy store and ice cream parlor has must-order items like 15 varieties of cupcakes (including root beer float and candied lemonade), fried Oreos, funnel cake fries, and a separate menu of nine different S’mores.

The Perfect Family Destination

As we drove home from Telluride, I reflected upon our whimsical, incident-free weekend and then panicked.

Me: “Quick—Tell me something that went wrong this weekend.”
Jamie: “Excuse me?”
Me: “I always have funny misadventures to write about on our trips, like when I fell getting off the chairlift in Crested Butte, or when we locked the keys in the running car in Steamboat.”
Jamie: “Huh. I don’t think anything went wrong this weekend. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.”

I won’t. But I’ll just classify Telluride as the perfect resort for an imperfect family.


© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Colorado, Family, Family travel, Humor, outdoors, skiing, travel

A Mormon Wedding Reception Intervention

March 24, 2011 By

An important facet of Mormonism is we believe marriages are eternal. Yep, that’s right, people. That dude you wake up to every morning with the rock-star hair? You’d better make sure he’s “the one” because you’ll be with him for this life and the next.

Though for Jamie, his decision was put in question when I woke up looking like this on a backpacking trip shortly after we got married.

Mormons do a great job at marriage because family is at the very core of our beliefs. Husband and wife are “sealed” together in the temple and children are born “in the covenant,” meaning our bond is not “‘Til death do you part.” It’s a cherished doctrine, one that gives me resolve to build the very best relationship possible and perspective that when a loved one dies, it is not the end.

What Mormons don’t do well? Throw weddings.

If you’ve never been to an LDS wedding, you’re not missing much. I’m not here to get anyone’s knickers in a twist but honestly, Mormon weddings are lame. The temple part, is of course, glorious, but what unfolds thereafter? Lame.

I’m not sure why, as a culture, we fail in this particular area. Maybe it’s because LDS couples marry young and weddings are expensive? Or is it that we’re so entrenched in tradition that we just can’t think outside of the box?

I’m certainly not here to condone spending thousands of dollars on a wedding. But here’s the simple fact: the majority of LDS celebrations are held in our church’s cultural hall. As in the gymnasium. I don’t care what an amazing decorator you are: basketball hoops can only look so good in crepe paper.

The evening generally consists of going through the line to small-talk with Uncle What’s-his-face, congratulating the happy couple, eating some finger foods and finishing it off with the cake. If you’re (not) lucky, the extended family will perform a talent show of some kind.

Believe me, not all Mormons perform like them thar Osmonds.

See what I’m saying?

Even if you have a tight budget, there are ways to pull together a great wedding. My husband’s sister had her reception in the grove of trees behind our local church and it was glorious–white lights, glowing lanterns, delicious food. All very her, classy and on a tight budget.

But I have simply fallen in love with this glorious LDS bike wedding:

Derek and Rebecca said in the invitations that there would be physical exercise and to wear comfortable clothing. But they didn’t tell everyone that they would be going on a progressive party around downtown LA on bikes! After the temple ceremony everybody walked around the corner and saw that there were rows and rows of rented bicycles. It was so exciting! Everyone spent some time decorating their bicycles, then we took off. The first stop was a picnic lunch at a park, the second was a stop in at the LA institution, Diddy Reese and the last stop was for toasts at a botanical garden.-Jordan Ferney



This wedding was so charming it was featured on Martha Stewart Weddings (seriously, you need to go see the entire slide show).

So, I’ve put it out there and will assuredly get a fair share of hate mail from angry brides professing their cultural hall wedding “was the very best day of my life!” I don’t dispute that in the least and to each their own.

I just wish I’d thought to do skis instead of bikes.

Note: After posting this, I have received an exorbitant amount of emails with LDS-related questions. Be sure to check out the fun feature I did a few years ago, LDS-Palooza, that answers every question you never thought to ask your friends, The Mormons.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Humor, LDS

World’s third largest cruiseship offers family fun of “Epic” proportions

March 23, 2011 By

March–It’s that time of year when Coloradoans start getting cabin fever and curse any groundhog who dares a winter extension. So allow me to indulge those craving warmer climes.

Last fall, my husband Jamie and I went on a second honeymoon aboard the Norwegian Epic, the third-largest cruise ship in the world that boasts world-class entertainment like Blue Man Group as well as family-friendly offerings. It had all the makings for an idyllic vacation and it mostly was. We:

*Marveled when Jamie landed the key role as “The Investor” during Cirque Dreams and Dinner’s show that was so awe-inspiring we thought we’d taken a detour to Vegas.

*Chartered a boat to go snorkeling in Costa Maya, frolicked with the dolphins in Cozumel and explored the second-largest reef in the world in Roatan, Honduras.

*Lounged by the ship’s two pools, five hot tubs, kid’s pool, three multi-story water slides and the 200-foot Epic Plunge, the only tube slide at sea.

*Cooled down with creamsicle smoothies in the 17-degree SVEDKA Ice Bar (only 1 of 3 in the world).

Factor in a hilarious Murder Mystery lunch from Second City comedy troupe, a Sports Complex, rock-climbing wall, spa and bowling and the only things missing were our kids (who would have gone crazy for the Nickelodeon™ at Sea programs that included poolside parties, breakfast with the characters and a lot more.)

To be honest, Norwegian is the only cruise line I’ve ever sailed because I love their Freestyle Cruising. Instead of having regimented schedules, passengers are given the flexibility to dine and do whatever activities they want, when they want to do them.

Apparently our pastimes primarily consisted of eating at the ships’ 17 restaurants because I gained 5 pounds.

Our week-long trip went reasonably smoothly until the very end. The night before disembarking the ship, passengers have the option to set their luggage outside their room by midnight so the porters can carry it off.

We packed up our belongings and upon my insistence, separated every stitch of our dirty and clean laundry in different suitcases.We set the suitcases outside the door and went to bed in our skivvies.

An hour later, Jamie arose with a horrifying realization: He forgot to leave out clothes to wear off the ship the next day.

He raced over to the cabin door and the luggage was already gone.

The next 12 hours are a blur that included horror (him) and an innocent bystander (me) being forced to pillage the ship’s lost-and-found.

It’s only appropriate aboard a ship named “Epic” that Murphy’s Law should also make an appearance of that proportion.

Epic Family Fun

Kids can meet their favorite Nickelodeon™ characters like SpongeBob SquarePants and Dora the Explorer with Nickelodeon™ at Sea. When you need grown-up time, they won’t even know you’re gone as they delve into the children’s programs at Recess or teen activities at Entourage. Fun includes a light up dance floor, Wii™ and PlayStation®3 gaming areas and a private karaoke performance stage that doubles a state-of-the-art surround sound cinema. Not-to-be forgotten are the Aqua Park’s multiple slides, bowling, the sports complex’s rock-climbing wall, batting cage, basketball and Spider Web, a 24-foot tall enclosed climbing cage.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Family travel, Humor, travel

Signs of the [sickly & crippled] times

March 22, 2011 By

Fortunately, the Johnson Clan has turned the corner (though we’re still not 100%). I’ve detailed our many ailments of 2011 of this blog that include perpetual illness, heart surgery and knee traumas.

Unfortunately, my kids have lived it.

Jamie and I have downplayed the gravity of much that has taken place but kids are perceptive. They kinda notice when their mom (a.k.a. the one who normally drags them all over tarnation) is bedridden so they played together a lot.

Hands down, their favorite toys are their abundance of stuffed animals. During healthier times, the animals would go on make-believe hiking adventures, ski down double-black diamond runs and race at the Olympics.

This week, the animals are sick. Bode professes his husky Lolly has a lengthy recovery ahead of him with back surgery and his beloved Tabby is having head surgery.

Let’s hope a nursing home is not in their (our) future.

==============

In related news, here’s a recent conversation I had with my beloved James.

Jamie: “I’ve been going over our financials. I have figured out what we owe for taxes, the heart surgery and the new refrigerator.”

Amber: “So pretty much that means I won’t have knee surgery until 2014?”

Jamie: “Actually, I think that’s a little soon.”

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Family, Hadley, Health, Humor

Parent-Teacher Conferences: Love ‘em or Hate ‘em?

March 21, 2011 By

Parent-teacher conference is this week. My children could not be more different and I’m learning to adapt and recognize the talents each child has.

At our last conference, I learned 6-year-old Hadley’s talent is not listening and 4-year-old Bode’s does not involve his fine motor skills.

I admittedly braced myself when I met with Haddie’s first-grade teacher. She excels in the arts and natural sciences but when it comes to reading, she has just finally caught up to her peers who were in full-day kindergarten. My husband Jamie isn’t exactly a stellar example. In his own words:

“I don’t have anything against books. I just don’t like reading them.”

But Haddie’s teacher wasn’t concerned about reading or the fact she is math-illiterate (she is allegedly on track with both). When it comes to multi-step instructions, my dear daughter gets a failing grade. In other words: listening.

Bode’s teachers love the little guy and who can blame them? He’s sweet, a great listener, well-behaved, is starting to read and beloved by his classmates. He is off-the-chart with math and while his peers are still learning to recognize single digits, he’s into double-digits and is constantly drilling me in my addition skills.

Confession: I count with my fingers behind my back.

I’m screwed when he graduates to multiplication tables.

The other night, their differences were on display as Haddie did her homework.

“I need to write the number 11. Hey, Bode. How do you write that number?”

“1 and 1,” he replied.

I looked over at her, dumbfounded. Had her preschooler brother really just helped her with her homework?

“Hey Mommy,” she continued. “I need to learn how to do things. You know, like a job to make money. All Bode and I know how to do is play.”

“I’m well aware of that, Hadley.”

“Yes, so we can learn how to do things like drive…and grow enormous pumpkins like Daddy.”

Something tells me I’ll never be an empty-nester.

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED AT MILEHIGHMAMAS.COM

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor, pumpkins
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