Because I’m supportive like that

Jamie recently sent me the following email regarding a message he received via his website’s contact form:

“My adoring fans demand more of ME…”

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Questions/Comments
Hi. My name is (Crazy Lady) and I am a Development and Casting Director working with (Crazy Lady) Media, the world’s third largest television production company.

We are currently working on a development project for a network focused on the Competitive World Of Extreme Gardening.

I would love to be in touch with you to provide you with more information and to see if you might be interested in participating in this project.

If you are interested in talking, please email your number or feel free to call me directly.

Thank you,
Crazy Lady

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He has an audition today.

My response? “Oh hell.”

Southwest Florida – World’s Best Beaches, More Canals Than Venice & Seashells Galore

“Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure this is the way,” my kayaking guide Jon Black of Crazy Lure Bait & Tackle Shop called back to me.

I sluiced through Southwest Florida’s cobalt-blue waters with my paddle and glanced around at the thick mangroves, their limbs gnarled and wild like the arms of a monster in a nightmare. The forest was strangely silent.  The previous day’s downpour had sent the birds into retreat mode and we felt alone.

I wasn’t worried; being lost is nothing new in my world. However, having a capable guide to help me find my way out was. We were winding through Cape Coral, Florida’s 400-mile network of canals (more than even Venice) and I was in my element as bottleneck dolphins and manatees skirted around us.

Prior to my trip, I wasn’t a fan of Florida. I had only visited its busiest cities and had equated the state with heat, humidity, retirees, overcrowded beaches and partying, never dreaming of the natural grandeur of Southwest Florida.

When it Rains, It Pours

Everything happens for a reason and the previous day’s downpour is among them. I was staying at the new Westin Cape Coral Resort at Marina Village, a luxurious new 236-room retreat perched overlooking the massive Caloosahatatchee River, waterways and the Gulf of Mexico

Map of Southwestern Florida's islandsThe rain put a literal damper on my plans to grab one of the hotel’s complimentary bikes and tour the Tom Allen Memorial Butterfly House at nearby Rotary Park. Plan B was to take the free 45-minute water taxi to Fort Myers Beach—an unspoiled sugar-hued beach oozing with tourist shops, tiki bars and fun—but that was canceled.

A hotel worker suggested we check-out the Miromar or Tanger Outlets (a good rainy-day activity) but I had a better one: “Let’s go to Sanibel and Captiva Islands.” The day prior, a friend had posted some pictures on Facebook and I was captiva-ted.

The Real Beaches of Lee County

An hour later, I met my guide Jon Black and we drove through the deluge, over the three-mile Sanibel Causeway and landed smack dab in the middle of paradise (or as Frommer’s travel guide quantified it: The No. 1 travel destination in the world).

Sanibel and Captiva Islands are a dream for wildlife and shell-lovers with 15 miles of unspoiled beaches, 25 miles of bike paths, 50 types of fish, 230 types of birds, 400 types of shells, no stop lights, a ban on fast-food chains and a law that dictates “no buildings taller than the tallest palm tree.”

Sanibel Lighthouse, Credit: TripAdvisor

Sanibel Lighthouse, Credit: TripAdvisor

During the height of tourist season (winter and summer), traffic on these small islands can be beastly but early-May’s shoulder season plus a rainy day equaled My Own Private Florida.

Jon started our tour at Lighthouse Park on the eastern tip of Sanibel where a functioning 1884 light tower stands sentry over Bahamas-blue waters and a fishing pier. A boardwalk nature trail winds through native wetlands and past mounds of shells from the Calusa Indians’ discarded fish bones, pieces of domestic tools and pottery, weapons and jewelry.

A Seashell Wonderland

We drove past multi-million dollar homes, eagle nests, quaint shops and porch cafes but we didn’t linger long. “There will be a break in the clouds,” Jon predicted. “If we hit it just right, we’ll be at the beach when the rain stops. The best time to go shelling is after a storm.”

World's Best Beaches, More Canals Than Venice, Seashells Galore in Southwest Florida

Seashells galore

Just as we pulled up to our destination–a short bridge that links Sanibel Island to Captiva Island over Blind Pass—the rain ceased. I suspected Jon was really Zeus, the Greek God who ruled over the sky, weather, thunder and law or maybe Moses because those clouds parted like the Red Sea.

Sanibel and Captiva Islands are consistently ranked the top shelling beaches in the nation due in part to the large plateau that extends out into the Gulf of Mexico for miles and acts like a shelf for seas shells to gather.

The moment my feet hit the sand I was a kid in a candy store, gathering up large piles of shells that formed a thick ribbon along the shore. I collected shell after shell, puzzled over the vast variety and vowed to visit the nearby Bailey-Matthews Shell Museum. This large natural history museum features exhibits of shells from around the world (one-third native to the area) and has a hands-on learning lab for kids.

A couple of the shells I grabbed were moderately big but Zeus wasn’t finished with his acumen. “Go in the water where the surf breaks. The big conch shells get stuck there.”

I waded knee-deep into the water, launching myself in the air whenever a wave rolled in. I hesitantly bent down (locals even have a name for this shelling stance: the “Sanibel Stoop”), and as I saw a white cap barreling toward me, I blindly reached out. I squealed with disbelief and glee—I had hit the shell jackpot and uncovered hundreds of them in a dizzying array of diversity.

The beauty of Sanibel and Captiva Islands

I could have stayed on that beach forever. The breeze from the Gulf was sultry and heavy-laden with salt. A great blue heron stalked me, no doubt unimpressed by my haul that was lacking in fish. Nature’s miracles were on display and it was one of the most surreal moments of my life.

The next day when I was flying home, I sat next to a Fort Myers cardiologist whose family has lived in the area for 120 years. Southwest Florida is world-renowned for its fishing and he divulged he was recently on his boat with a friend when he had the epiphany, “I can’t believe I actually live in this amazing place.”

Neither can I.

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Other Family Activities

J.N. "Ding" Darling National Wildlife RefugeJ.N. “Ding” Darling National Wildlife Refuge is a 7,608-acre primordial wetland on Sanibel Island that is brimming with 35 species of mammals, 102 species of fish, exotic birds and alligators. A network of trails ranging from ¼- to 4 miles-long are ideal for trekking or biking. Wildlife Drive provides a drivable safari through one of the largest mangrove wildernesses in the country. Kids will love the education center and scanning the interpretive signs’ QR codes to learn more. The driving trail is closed on Fridays but will be undergoing some construction projects Summer 2013 so check the website for updates.

Edison and Ford Winter EstatesEdison and Ford Winter Estates—Thomas Edison and Henry Ford, two of the most prolific geniuses of their time, both spent their winters in Fort Meyers on a 13-acre estate bordering the river. This historic site offers more than just a look at their winter homes, museum, lush grounds and laboratory but an appreciation for how they forever changed the landscape of the automobile industry, movies and film, lighting and electricity and sound and communications. Kids will enjoy the Young Inventors educational programs, where many a burgeoning scientific genius is borne.

Matlacha and Pine IslandMatlacha and Pine Island— Pine Island is the largest island (18 miles long, two miles wide) off Florida’s Southwestern Gulf Coast. It is ensconced by mangroves and aquatic preserves. Not-to-be missed are Matlacha’s funky fishing and artist colonies that prove colored paint goes a long way. Stop by eccentric Southwest Florida icon Leoma Lovegrove’s gallery, which will make you swear you’ve been dropped into a Dr. Seuss book of unbridled color and imagination. Tour the botanical gardens. Then cool down on ice cream served in a coconut. Paint your very own coconut postcard while overlooking the canal that leads to Matlacha Pass (some people even visit the gallery by boat). Keep on living your vacation when your coconut arrives in your mailbox a week later.

Bubble Room restaurantBubble Room–When I asked the staff at the Westin Cape Coral where to eat on Captiva Island, the enthusiastic response was “The Bubble Room!” This happiness-inducing eatery is whimsical, quirky fun and a beloved local tradition. With a creed, “It’s always Christmas at the Bubble Room” the hodgepodge of décor includes Santas, old-style Hollywood glamour, trains, and toys. Wacky “Bubble Scout” wait staff are dressed in girl and boy scout uniforms. The food is great, too. Portions sizes are large. Order their infamous red velvet cake and try not to be bitter when you learn about it later.

Thanks for the Westin Cape Coral at Marina Village for hosting me! Be sure to check-out my hotel review about the view that blew my mind.


Introducing the newest member of our family

It’s a bit belated but I’d like to introduce you to the newest member of our family: our new deck! We’ve been in our house for almost 10 years and have been using a temporary (read: crappy) paver-stone deck with a patio set I bought at a garage sale years ago.

Those days are no  more! I worked my butt off on a big project all winter and with those funds, we hired someone to build a nice little refuge in our backyard. We still need to stain the pillar and pergola and put up the shade cloth but you get the idea. Our finishing touches were writing our individual prayers on Prayer Flags and stringing them across the entrance.

Yes I’m a little bit obsessed with Nepal. Though reluctant at first, Jamie was all-in when we wrote a “pumpkin” prayer for him.

To christen our deck, we hosted a neighborhood progressive dinner a few weeks ago. And then had a big group of friends over for Family Home Evening last week. I had a gift card to try out Chipotle’s new catering and haven’t had the chance to use it. A non-occasion turned out to be the perfect occasion!But most importantly, what does Fat Kitty think of the new deck? He had a rocky introduction to it a few months ago when the builder had it framed. Jamie painted it with some water-resistant stain and Hadley decided to take Fat Kitty in the backyard. Within minutes, The Fat One jumped onto the wet paint. It wasn’t bad enough that it got all over his feet but his fat gut sags so much he got the paint all over his belly, too.

He was greatly displeased when we had to scrub him down in the bath.

Bathing beauty

But he’s gotten over it.

 

Life in Pictures: Field Trips and Those Irate Pigs

My next two weeks are too frenzied to detail so I won’t even try. Even our last day of school on May 30 won’t be the end of it as our summer travel and play season ramps up. No complaints here. What I will complain about it finally recovering from a cold and having a nasty cough that keeps me up most nights.

Yep, Fat Kitty and Jamie have still abandoned me.

Field Trip

We’ve been cramming it all in, including Bode’s class field trip to the Denver Aquarium. I was put in charge of a group of four kids that included a sweet but mentally unstable girl. Think I’m lying? Their last field trip, the teacher had her husband be solely in charge of her. But he didn’t have my secret weapon: Bode. He ensured she stayed on task in his OCD yet kind way and we all had a grand old time.

With bestie Brody

I didn’t lose even one kid so deemed it a success.

Field Day

Then there was Bode’s field day. From obstacle courses to hula-hooping to long-jumping, it’s one of the highlights of the year.

Long jump

A new addition this year was  the game “Rat Tag” (bottom top right) where kids put a rope in the back of their shorts and tried to grab each others’ tails.

First grade field day

It was rather unsettling when I realized I was yelling at Bode to get some “tail” from the girls.

Animal Project

First graders in Colorado need to do a big research project on an animal and Bode chose a sloth. This month-long ordeal included a lot of research, whipping up his first PowerPoint presentation and he then had to do an oral presentation to the class based on his diorama or poster.

I was put in charge of helping him and confirmed that he has inherited my lack of artistic ability. After a few frustrated meltdowns (from us both) I think we did pretty good job.

Though I won’t mention the mammoth bone structure our resident artists Hadley and Jamie constructed last month that looked like it was right out of the Ice Age. #overachievers

Farm Girl

Hadley had a three-day field trip to a farm a couple of weeks ago. I went back and forth on volunteering, ultimately bowing out because I planned a garage sale with my neighbor. It’s a good thing, too because that’s when I got sick and it rained for most of the three days. You know, in Colorado. Where is almost never rains.

I wish I’d snapped a picture of her when she returned home after three days of camping in the muck and rain. Let’s just say I’ve never smelled anything quite like it (and hope to never again).

Activity Day Girl

She and I also had a mother-daughter night out with the Activity Girl days at church. This group of 8-11-year-old girls meet together a couple of times a month for activities that range from sporting events to service projects to crafts. They planned a fun night of dinner with fun games from Minute to Win It.Because nothing says mother-daughter bonding like having a nylon on your head as you pretend to be an elephant knocking ball. #YouHadToBeThere

Angry Piggies

Bode wrapped his sixth soccer season with his buddies. He scored regularly and even had four goals in one game. Their team name has evolved from the Lava Bullets to this season’s gem: “The Angry Piggies.” Don’t knock it. They had they winningest season ever.

Here’s to surviving the final two weeks of school!

Jamie’s sigh of relief

For the past few years, Jamie has taken Bode on our church’s father-son camp-out with the Scouts. On Bode’s first adventure, he’d had a big day: his preschool class went to a play at Heritage Square, followed by a fun night with the Scouts of Capture the Flag, roasting marshmallows and hot dogs and basic revelries any boy would love.

As he and Jamie contentedly nestled in their sleeping bags under a blanket of stars, Bode queried:

“Do you know what’s better than camping, Daddy?”

“What, Bode?”

“Musicals.”

It has taken Jamie a few years to recover from that one but I’m sure he was very pleased when I asked Bode his favorite part about going camping at Bear Creek Lake State Park last weekend and he replied, “Killing fire ants.”

My, what a difference a few years makes.

How NOT to honor the mother of your children on Mother’s Day

The Husband: “What tie should I wear?”

Me: “The maple leaf one to honor your Canadian wife on Mother’s Day.”

Him: “It’s broken.”

On Raising Miss Independence

When did these kids of mine start growing up?

I admittedly couldn’t wait to get through the baby stage (a colicky, sleepless newborn will do that do you) but now that they are fun and thriving, I want to put the brakes on this whole growing up thing. Everywhere he goes, Bode sings and always has a smile on his face while Hadley’s growing self-confidence in her school work is making her happy and agreeable.

They are ready to start flexing their wings and I’m straining to give them more independence but it’s tough, even for a non-helicopter parent like me.

When we were in the mountains at YMCA of the Rockies last winter, we drove past their summer camp facility, Camp Chief Ouray. I described it to the kids–five days of new friendships, horseback riding, swimming, hiking, rope courses, field games, firesides, skits and more. They thought it sounded like the coolest thing ever and judging from the camp’s active alumni community and the fact it’s almost sold out, it is.

A couple of years ago, Hadley took her first solo flight to see Grandma in Utah and we’ve been promising Bode the chance to do the same thing. So, when we found out he needed to be 7 to go to camp (he’s a month shy), we decided to book him a flight.

Neither of my kids have ever been the hang-on-my-leg-begging-me-not-to-go types. Bode was more clingy when he was younger but now, they’re up for pretty much any adventure, anytime. And I’m so relieved they’re courageous and thriving.  (If you’re a helicopter-type, read this article about why playing and “helping” them actually hinders their creativity and development).

But sometimes I think I’ve done too good of a job of raising them to be independent.

I recently registered Hadley for Camp Chief Ouray and paid $175 for the additional horse camp option. She’s obsessed with learning to ride, lessons are expensive and the more affordable programs like Westernaires require parent volunteers to do menial tasks like mucking out stalls.

HELL, NO. (Can you tell I’m not a fan of horses?)

She was literally bouncing off the wall when I told her she was confirmed for horse camp and fired questions at me a million miles a minute. I was jealous and happy for her–I was a big fan of the Parent Trap and always wanted to go to camp as a kid. And then I got worried. Would she be OK? Would she miss us at all?

“Hadley, you’re not going to be homesick, are you?”

“Don’t worry about it, Mom. I’ll forget about you.”

She’ll never be mistaken for the sentimental type.

 

 

 

Hanging with the big guns at 9News

The first Monday of the month is always a big one because that’s when my column comes out in The Denver Post and I usually do a segment on 9News to promote it. Here are the articles:

Hadley’s birth story (you may have seen it before).

Mother’s day gift ideas

Setting up Mother’s Day picks

But that was not the big news: some buff firefighters arrived to promote the latest Colorado Firefighter’s Calendar. I was dying to get a picture with them but they were taking forever in the studio and I would’ve had to fight off all the female employees who kept finding reasons to sneak onto the set.

And really, who can blame them.  It was one rough day on the job.

First Grade Academia Marvels

I’ve decided I want to raise a geek. Seriously. Other parents can have their popularity and cheerleading contests because I don’t want my kid to get caught up in that rat race. The nicest teenagers I know are the geeks–they’re smart, respectful, have a great group of supportive friends and go on to have successful careers.

Bode is turning into a little geek and I couldn’t be more proud. He loves learning. I bought him an interactive Intelliglobe for Christmas and that boy is constantly drilling me on my continents, populations and ecology with his globe’s 18 touch and explore features, trivia and multiple choice challenges. He’s also borderline obsessed with getting to the very end of Raz Kids with its interactive ebooks, downloadable books, and reading quizzes. And math. Don’t even get me started with math. Everything begins and ends with numbers.

I don’t remember a lot about first grade. I was still pretty cute (that quickly changed a couple years later) and I was madly in love with Phillip Cutler who later moved to Texas (oh, the heartbreak). And that I got a lot of nosebleeds. Beyond that, first grade was pretty much a wash.

Last week, Bode had his parent-teacher conference and he led us around his classroom showing us his various projects, playing a math game and reading. It’s amazing to see how much his writing has improved since the beginning of the year–from one-sentence paragraphs to multi-page essays. He’s thriving in all areas and only missed one answer on the state-wide standardized BEAR test.

Jamie, of course, had to give him a hard time about that.

For reading, he’s currently testing out at the same level as a second grader at the end of the year.

Jamie joked he could take next year off. That husband of mine thought he was the parent-teacher stand-up comedian. Bode’s teacher wasn’t that amused.

We were blown away by it all but the kicker was at the end. Bode has been working on a research project on an animal of his choice: sloths. He sat us down to show us the PowerPoint presentation he had prepared on the subject.

Things have changed a wee bit since I was in first grade.

Why I will not be going to beauty school

I’m Florida-bound today and will be checking out the Westin Cape Coral Resort at Marina Village for Travel Mamas. I committed to the trip before I realized one very important thing: I would be missing the kids’ piano recital. I am particularly remorseful because it is Bode’s first one.

Fortunately, Aunt Lisa came to the rescue, as per this email chain from yesterday.

Lisa: Jamie, I know that Amber is out of town this week, so I’m a little worried how Haddie is going to look for her piano recital (and Bode too but we can’t do much for him J ).  This is not to offend you but you are a guy (that’s true).  Let me know if you need any help and I can stop by your place before the recital.  Are you offended now?  I didn’t think so. lol

Jamie: I have never been offended by having less work to do.  Especially when it comes to girly stuff.  Feel free to swing on by.

Me: AMEN, Lisa. I sent Jamie an itinerary for the week and included on it for them to dress nicely for the recital. I was also worried about Bode going to school every day with bedhead without me there to comb it down so I took matters into my own hands and tried cutting it for the first time yesterday. Those two bald spots on the side of his head will hopefully grow back soon. #NoLie

Jamie: No joke.  Our neighbor asked what letters were carved into the side of Bode’s hair yesterday.  She asked, “is it a G?”   I then began to explain that Bode is a big fan of the Green Bay Packers and that it was a G that he requested on the side of his head.”

Lisa: Oh no.  We are not Green Bay Packers fans in this family.  I’ll go buy him a hat!!! lol

Jamie: Lol  #savebodeshead

Hair grows back, right?

And for the record, I shaved that “G” for Great, which is how he’s going to do at his first recital.

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Video of Bode’s recital

Video of Hadley’s recital