The cute and not-so cute of Halloween

November 2, 2015 By

Lest you think my family is Halloween-obsessed, you’d be correct.  My mom always went all-out with our homemade costumes and I have such wonderful memories of friends, family and trick-or-treating marathons around our area.

Here’s a a glimpse at some of our extended clan’s festivities.

Jamie’s sister Tammy had a Wizard of Oz theme. If they kept with traditions, they setup a huge screen on their front lawn in Salt Lake City and showed classic black-and-white movies on Halloween night.


I was feeling weird that I have more Halloween decorations than Christmas until I saw my brother Pat and sister-in-law Jane’s storage:

Jamie: I NEED MORE DECORATIONS!!!

Jane always throws a killer pumpkin-carving party with 50+ friends and family.

Not to be forgotten: my niece’s darling angelic and devilish kiddos:

And for my brother Jade? There are no words.

He responded to our mullet insults on Facebook: “If I would’ve had more time the full duct man costume would’ve been re-created this year!!”

Counting our blessings on that one. He’s newly single and ready for the taking, Ladies.

Filed Under: holidays, Humor

Happy Halloween!

November 1, 2015 By

As much as I love Halloween, it made me a bit sad this year. The kids are growing up fast–too fast–and let’s face it: Halloween just isn’t the same without little kids. This Facebook flashback from five years ago tells the tale with our cute Mario and Princess Peach. Apparently the only thing that hasn’t changed is Jamie’s pumpkin obsession.

Hadley in particular looked so grownup as an archer. Aren’t my  girl and maple tree gorgeous?

 

My friend Suzy was generous enough to send Bode a legit NASA costume, which he beefed up with Jamie’s scary pumpkin mask. Um, OK.

Between our ward’s truck-or-treat and class parties, there was plenty of fun.

Sixth grade

The Pumpkins also made celebrity appearances at the Volunteers of America Halloween party for homeless families….

…And visited our local high school’s special needs kids and our kids’ school. Bode proudly made a speech while Hadley pretended she didn’t know us. I wore my embarrassing pumpkin glasses just for her.

Our neighborhood has been ranked #5 as the best neighborhoods to trick-or-treat in Denver, which I attribute to our fire station that hosts a party and fire-truck-led procession, and then the countless families that go all-out for Halloween. That parade has been one of our highlights–it’s so fun seeing all our friends dressed up but Hadley was among the oldest so her days are numbered.

Jake, Noah, Nicky, Bode, Vinny and Curtis

Our superhero neighbors

Another reason for my nostalgia: gone are the days when we trick-or-treat as a family. My friend Julie took Bode out with all his besties while I threw a party for the tweens in our ward. A few of the girls dressed for fashion, not comfort (roockies) and after an hour, ditched their shoes to go barefoot. Hadley could have trick-or-treated for hours (chip off the old block) but when you have half your group blistered and limping, you call it early after a mere hour and a half, go back to your house to review and trade your stash, and watch a spooky movie.

And yes, I was the killjoy who kept yelling at Waldo to STOP HIDING SO I COULD TAKE A PICTURE.

Happy Halloween 2015!

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, holidays, Humor, Jamie

It’s a Labor Day Extravaganza!

September 9, 2015 By

We’ve been out of town the last several years for Labor Day and I have since learned that everything happens over the long weekend. Seriously. We had a whirlwind of events, parties and activities, starting with Denver’s popular A Taste of Colorado with 50+ restaurants and more. I say “more” because we didn’t care about the carnival rides, booths or concerts…we were all about the food and sampled everything from fried alligator (tasted like tortured chicken) to Navajo tacos to frozen cheesecake on a stick.

I somehow found myself throwing not one but two parties. The first, of course, was for the BYU football game on Saturday (read about that here) and the other was for our neighborhood get together. The bad: two parties is a lot of work. The good: we only had to clean once.

On Saturday morning, our family cleaned up the yard, garage, and house, all the while Hadley and Bode sang our praises for teaching them that life isn’t always about play–slave labor is important, too. They’ll be doubly thrilled when next Saturday is spent cleaning the church and rebuilding our retaining wall that Jamie accidentally collapsed last spring while juggling YW volleyball (I’m coaching) and Bode’s first soccer game.

After church on Sunday, we invited our neighborhood over for a soiree. When our kids were younger, they did everything together but now that they’re in different schools and activities, gone are the days of everyone hanging out endlessly (very sad, really). It was the perfect farewell-to-summer bash.

I love these ladies and they all lead admirable lives but none more enviable than Meredith “Sunday Funday” who brought her own soda and ice from her new $3,000 commercial ice machine. Forgot her beautifully-appointed home. Perfectly-cubed ice is when you know you’ve arrived.

 

Do you see that sandpit to the left of the trampoline? If we’d waited a week, our retaining wall would have been rebuilt so we could house the trampoline back on the sand, not in the middle of our yard. Fat Kitty is the only one who has benefited from this and thinks the sand is his big, fat kitty litter box. Don’t worry, we cleaned it before everyone arrived.

For Labor Day, we got invited over to our good friends the Lara’s house. They recently moved into a new home that needed a complete overhaul (and when I say complete, I mean it because the previous owner was an alcoholic hoarder). So many friends and ward members chipped in (I helped paint one day and then move another) and it’s really coming along.

A rainstorm started just as we were leaving so I called my friend Lisa to see if the party was still on. “As long as there’s no lightning, we’re playing,” she promised. Just as we showed up, the rain subsided and we had a fun afternoon with loads of friends playing in their pool and volleyball (here’s a short video of Bode’s big launch).

With Labor Day behind us, I’m officially ready for fall. Colorado weather: please act accordingly.

Filed Under: holidays

Happy Mother’s Day!

May 10, 2015 By

I’ve been blessed with an amazing mom, mother-in-law and friends who are superb examples of what a noble and sacred calling motherhood really is. I absolutely love this quote:


“You will never be this loved again. So, on those days when you are feeling stressed out, touched out, and depleted, just remember that you will never be this loved again. One day you will long for their affection. So choose a soft voice, choose gentle hands, choose love.” -AK

I was recently talking to Bode about our summer plans and I told him that he and his sister were not going to wimp out at Elitch Gardens Theme Park. Last year, the park opened a new ride called the Brain Drain and they refused to go on this fun 7-story ride that does that sends riders forwards, backwards and head-over-heels in an adrenaline-packed 360° revolution. I’m a firm believer in pushing kids out of their comfort zones. However, I’m not out to traumatize them. At Disney, they go on rides far scarier and they drag me on Space Mountain (which I HATE).

A couple of years ago, my friend Tina made me ride the Mind Eraser at Elitch and it was 90 seconds of sheer hell. And swearing. Then repentance.  I’d never make them go on that.

But the Brain Drain is a nice, gentle introduction to Hades, without all the fire and brimstone. Bode doesn’t agree.

“Mom, I’m not going on the Brain Drain. You can’t force a child to do something.”

“I can and I will. It’s called motherhood.”

 

Filed Under: Bode, holidays, Humor

The Bunny Came Back

April 13, 2015 By

When Jamie and I were first married, he waged war with one of most treasured possessions: Mr. Bunny. When I went away to college, my mom started the tradition of sending me decorations for every holiday. This has continued even today and I have quite the collection.

Mr. Bunny has been with me for years. Not only is he cute and fluffy but he wiggles his cottonball tail while singing “Here Comes Peter Cottontail.” Who could resist that?

As it turns out, Jamie. Since those early days, he has developed a veritable hatred for rabbits partly because of Mr. Bunny but mostly because they are neighborhood pests who eat our garden. He has waged war to keep them out of our yard and has had the children in on the action from an early age. Whenever t Hadley would see a bunny, she was instructed to chase it out of the yard and if she caught it, she was going to “break his neck!”

Imagine this coming from a sweet 3-year-old’s mouth; obviously that was her father talking, not her. (Though her bestie Alex accidentally did that to her sister’s bunny when she was young. Jamie has never praised her more.)

The lowpoint of our newlywed years was after a particularly charming performance from Mr. Bunny, he went missing. I was worried sick…until I received a ransom letter from my new groom. Pictured on it was poor Mr. Bunny, bound and blindfolded with an encrypted message.  I don’t remember how his torture chamber played out but Mr. Bunny eventually returned but he never sang again. It was like his very fluffy soul had been stomped upon by the Enemy of the Easter Bunny Spirit.

Fast-forward to my recent visit to Canada. I haven’t been home for Easter in years so it was fun to bring out the multiple storage bins of Easter treasures from my youth.

Imagine my sheer delight when I was unpacking them to discover my mom had not one but TWO Mr. Bunnies, who were sting singing that beloved song. I begged my mom to take one home with me and she generously acquiesced. I would surprise Jamie and I knew just how excited he’d be!

I called home to give him a teaser. I mentioned we’d been decorating my parent’s house for Easter and that I had a special surprise for him.

“It’s not that ##$#$* rabbit, is it?”

Little did I know he’s also a soothsayer.

Filed Under: holidays, Humor, Jamie

Holiday Happenings: In Pictures

January 14, 2015 By

I know we’re well into January but I realized I barely touched upon the holidays. I had my doubts about staying in Denver but we ended up having the perfect mix of playtime and downtime. Here are a few of my favorite things:

The kids’ piano recital. Hadley played “Away in a Manger” while Bode Rocked around the Christmas Tree. As usual, Hadley made me pray for a Christmas miracle because she could barely make it through the song during practice but it finally clicked a few days prior and they both did great!

My solo afterward was the hallelujah shout.

Our ward party is always a blast filled with awesome friends, delicious food, Santa and a live band that featured…Elvis?

Who says Mormons don’t know how to party?!!!!

One night, we opted to watch The Hobbit downtown so we could see the Christmas lights and stroll through the charming Denver Christkindl Market.

Christkindl Photobomb!

I thought the STIHL-sponsored photobooth with the chainsaw cutting off Bode’s head was a particularly nice touch.

We also discovered quite possibly the best present ever: The “NO” pen. Click the link below for our quick video to watch my demonstration.

IMG_5111

It has since gone missing. I suspect The Children may have had something to do with it.

I had a blast appearing on 9News’ ugly sweater segment.

And an even bigger blast when about 50 friends showed up for our sledding party!

On another day, we skated Evergreen Lake, followed by Country Road Cafe.

We did a lot of baking and played a lot of games…

Making cinnamon rolls

…in our PJs.

We made a point to do some service and volunteered at the Santa House to distribute gifts to low-income kiddos. My good friend Sam was about 45 weeks pregnant so we invited her three young kids over for the afternoon for “Elf Camp” with games and snacks. Hadley and her friend Alex were the entertainment committee and they did marvelously…until it came time to change Zoe’s diaper. It would appear we have some work to do before they’re ready to start babysitting.

Though New Year’s Eve day was a bust with our ski trip,we had a fun New Year’s Eve ringing in 2015 with our friends, the Carrolls.

Though they may not say the same thing.

I’ll likely be banned from bringing silly string in the future.

On New Year’s Day, we were invited over to the Huntleys for a PJ/Ebelskiver party!
We didn’t even bother getting dressed for our fondue dinner that night. Things got a bit blurry…


Because of this wild ‘n crazy Martinelli’s kid.

But nothing says Welcome to 2015 quite like lazy gluttony.

It’s gonna be a good year.

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, holidays, Humor

A Tenderloin Meltdowning, Mexican-Denver Christmas

December 30, 2014 By

Christmas day was one of our most low-key ever. We had planned a huge spread of food with Jamie’s brother and sister but a couple of days prior, they contracted the stomach flu. I received the news shortly after I splurged and bought a $100 beef tenderloin.

Two words: all mine.

Since we weren’t having guests, didn’t need to be anywhere and it started snowing later in the day, we opted to stay in our PJs. Side note: When you declare it a PJ Christmas, it sounds official vs. not getting dressed is just plain lazy.

Though our Santa hats said “naughty” on one side and “nice” on the other, this is what we both insisted upon.

Rather telling, wouldn’t you agree?

Our kids are at funny ages with Christmas. Hadley no longer believes but still loves the magic of it all. Bode is in denial and I’m not ready to burst his bubble. Neither of them could think of anything they wanted for Christmas. Their big gift was the trampoline we bought a few weeks ago and on Christmas day, they got archery sets, clothes, games and movies with the big reveal at the end.

Jamie’s favorite present from Fat Kitty: “How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You”

A couple of weeks ago, Southwest Vacations reached out and asked me if I’d like to go to Mexico. The email was originally sent to spam because really, who gets offered trips to Mexico? But, it was legit and we’ve been working out the details for a quick three-night trip to Cancun in January.

Jamie typed up a big reveal and put it in a manilla envelope on the tree. The kids discovered it at the end and the suspense would have been perfect if they had been able to read the cursive handwriting he used.

Note to self: Don’t use the fancy, illegible font.

The Mexico “Big Reveal”

Regardless, everyone is is so grateful for the opportunity and downright ecstatic. The kids have never been to Cancun so it will be a wonderful getaway.

The rest of the day, we watched our new movies Maleficent (loved) and Guardians of the Galaxy (hated), the kids played more video games than I preferred, we ate a lot of treats, had some cutthroat games of Pit and tested out Jamie’s new ebeskiver (Danish pancakes) pan, his gift from the kids.

I just love gifts that keep on giving.

For dinner, my magnificent tenderloin almost resulted in my nervous breakdown. Jamie was grilling the $100 hunk ‘o beef when he came inside.

“Bad news.”

“WHAT?!”

“Our propane tank is empty.”

Don’t ask me how that happened because I always have one as a back-up. As my veins started bulging out of my head, I realized that I am like The Old Man on “A Christmas Story.” Remember his obsession with the holiday turkey? That is me with my grilled tenderloin.

Jamie roasted it in the oven and, though it wasn’t was succulent as grilled, it was still delicious.

Thanks heavens we didn’t have to resort to the local Chinese restaurant.

Fa-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra.

 

 

 

Filed Under: Family, holidays, Humor

It’s Christmas Eve in the City

December 29, 2014 By

When Jamie announced “we’re staying in Denver for Christmas,” I admittedly wasn’t too thrilled.  What on earth would we do for 2.5 weeks when we could be using that precious time off from school to travel?

As it turns out, plenty. We’ve been so busy in recent years going from grandparent-to-grandparent that our kids have no memories of Christmas day in our own home. Though we had a wonderful time in Utah last year with Jamie’s clan–and there is nothing in the world as fun as my family’s uproarious Christmas Eve–it was nice to actually be home to receive the onslaught of cards and treats from our generous friends throughout the week. We’ve been playing with them non-stop and it warms my heart to have such a cohesive ward family that is our family away from home.

It has also been my least stressful Christmas ever.  When my parents visited last month, I sent their gifts home early with them and I completed 99% of our shopping during my many excursions with my mom. On Christmas Eve day, all that was left to do was clean up and bake a bit and we went for a beautiful walk and skimmed rocks on the icy pond.

That night, the Cardons (a new family from our ward) invited several people over for a fantastic feast and plenty of fun Minute to Win It Games. In this picture, the kids are trying to flip a Rudolph pom-pom onto their Vaseline-greased nose.

Minute to Win It is just a nice way of  humiliating yourself publicly.

Case in point: panty hose antlers. We were divided up into families and the challenge was to blow up 10 balloons, stuff them in panty hose, put the “antlers” on someone’s head and belt out “Jingle Bells.”

We won. Or maybe by the looks of this picture, we were the goofball losers.

An awesomely fun night was topped off by a gift exchange and the kids performing the Nativity. For years, Hadley has been vying to be Mary (remember the Mary Mother of Jesus Take-down from last year?) And of course, several other girls wanted to be Mary as well. To make it fair, we drew names and I was relieved when Hadley won, for the sole reason she can stop bugging us every year about it.

All the boys (including Bode) wanted to be wisemen and I bribed another one of them to be our token shepherd. I usually have to coax a boy to be Joseph because, let’s face it, being married to a girl is pretty gross. I was surprised when Hadley’s arch nemesis Bryan (whom she endlessly loves to torment) volunteered. I didn’t bother to point out to either of them that it actually meant they were husband and wife.

Hadley bonded more with donkey Addison than she did Joseph


Our whirlwind night was topped off by opening our Christmas PJs when we arrived home.

Christmas PJs with Elves on the Shelf photobomb

And Hadley had waited to intentionally pull our her tooth so the Tooth Fairy and Santa would have to work overtime.

Because Santa didn’t have enough going on that night.

Filed Under: holidays, Humor, LDS

Wishing you a lice-free Christmas!

December 24, 2014 By

Usually I spend at least two days baking Christmas goodies for all our neighbors and friends. However, since we were sick last week and I had done a lot of baking for my 9News segment the week before, I was all baked out.

That is just a nice way of saying I am half-baked.

So, I only made a couple of batches of almond rocha and caramel toffee squares to distribute to a few families with whom we usually exchange gifts.  On Sunday night, we watched The Nativity Story and then drove around looking at Christmas lights. Upon the recommendation of my friend Jenn, we stumbled upon a new favorite at 8300 Balsam Street (for locals to check-out). This picture doesn’t even do it justice. The grandson told us his grandma has been doing this light display for 17 years and hand-makes all the wooden structures. To the right of the driveway, there are several more animated figurines…the whole thing defines Christmas magic.

We were so inspired we went home and watched National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. Me thinks The Pumpkin Man needs to step it up next year.

As we were delivering treats, we always belt out “We wish you a Merry Christmas” because what brings more joy than off-key caroling? When our friend Meredith came to the door, she said her daughter had been bugging her to do the same thing as us “because those Johnsons have such a fun tradition.”

It’s like we’re the Christmas Spirit Incarnate.

I didn’t divulge that I’ve spent the last few weeks murmuring about Denver’s too-balmy weather, citing “Even The Grinch had a White Christmas!”

Our final stop was to some of our dearest friends. They had stayed home from church due to a rumored lice outbreak. And if anyone knows lice, it’s me. As they opened the door, we belted out, “We wish you a lice-less Christmas” as we donned our gay apparel lice-protective headgear.

After all, friends with “head afflictions” should not be exempt from our Christmas cheer.

Filed Under: holidays, Humor

The Other Side of Salvation Army’s Bell Ringers

December 22, 2014 By

A few weeks ago, we had our Cub Scouts bring a recipe of a dinner they wanted to make and guesstimate how much each ingredient would cost. The following week, we met at our local grocery store and “pretend shopped” by giving them a tour of the store, teaching them about labels, bargains and ads while comparing what they thought their items cost to the actual price. It was an eye-opening experience as they realized just how much it costs to feed a family.

When I asked what they had learned, one boy observed, “It taught me I need to eat less.”

“You’re a growing boy who needs to eat,” I countered. “Instead, it should teach you to be grateful your parents have money to buy food and to not be wasteful. Because every time you throw away food, you’re throwing away money you spent on it.”

Deep, even for me.

While we were waiting for the boys to arrive at the grocery store, Bode and I chatted with the man ringing the bell for the Salvation Army’s annual charity drive. I’ve always tried to donate when I can but this article, The Other Side of the Bell, really resonated with me:

I observed human nature in action, a real-life lab experiment on how people behave in what – to them – is an awkward relationship. Some people couldn’t have been nicer, whether they plopped change in the kettle or not; they’d say hi, maybe make a comment about the cold, or at least nod.

But the majority of people who strode past on that busy afternoon were determined to avoid eye contact. I had become, in some respects, invisible.

So, for the record, and to offer an assist for people – maybe you – who don’t know how to handle that situation during the holiday season, allow me to explain the point of view of those on the other side of the bell.

Read the full story here.

Take a moment to read it because my attitude and reactions to those ringing the bell has completely changed. As Bode and I talked to the exuberant bell ringer, he asked if we wanted to take a turn.  Suddenly, we were on The Other Side of the Bell and just like the author, my cute little Cub Scout bell ringer was ignored and passed over without a second glance.

He got one donation: from his Mama.

After being on The Other Side of the Bell, just remember that even if you can’t spare any money that even a simple smile or a friendly exchange are worth their weight in gold.

 

Filed Under: Bode, holidays
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