The truth: revealed

October 13, 2009 By

So, I’m curious to hear what your experiences with Parent-Teacher Conferences have been?

I am meeting with Hadley’s beloved kindergarten teacher today for our first meeting. I’m not sure of what to expect but am not too worried because Hadley is shockingly well behaved in the classroom. She only ever had one *incident* in preschool.

And then she suffered Abuse By Carbs.

When I scheduled the appointment, I mentioned it to Jamie.

Me: You should come to Hadley’s Parent-Teacher Conference with me.

Jamie: I’m not taking the blame.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Hadley, Humor, Jamie

The Wienermobile: The Ultimate Vehicle for Wacky Family Bonding

October 5, 2009 By

I get to do a lot of cool things through my job such as the time my family got an all-access pass at Disneyland or when we got an exclusive tour of the National Museum of Natural History.

OK, so may we didn’t actually do these things but we recently experienced something equally as life-altering:

My family rode in the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile.

My first encounter with this 27-foot-long hot dog on wheels was last summer when I rode “shotbun” at a blogging conference in Chicago. I stayed in touch with the publicists via Twitter and was delighted to hear it would be visiting a King Soopers near my house.

As an FYI, there are six Wienermobiles that travel the nation extolling the virtues of processed meat (and making middle-aged women’s dreams come true). At most events, the Wienermobile’s doors remain closed to prevent wear and tear but the PR reps told me if we arrived at the end of the shift, we could get a ride.

I recruited 5-year-old Hadley but she was initially a naysayer.

“How can we ride in a giant hot dog, Mommy?”

Screw Disneyland. The Wienermobile is where the impossible becomes a reality.

Hadley and I arrived on schedule and we were welcomed by Wiernermobile staffers Adam and Crystal. We transported Haddie’s booster seat, put on her “meatbelt,” looked up at the “bunroof” and were on our way.

“Where to?” Adam queried.
“Any chance we could drive by my house so my husband can see it? We live less than a mile away!”

He responded affirmatively and I immediately called Jamie. “YOU WON’T WANT TO MISS THIS SO GET OUTSIDE NOWWWW.”
IMG_3111
We arrived a few minutes later to father and son waiting on the curb in anticipation. They were delighted when Adam offered them a ride as well. As Jamie raced to get Bode’s car seat, I peeked around hoping for even one curious neighbor to witness my metamorphosis from geek to chic.

The street was abandoned.

In the end, it didn’t matter. We cruised around, “ketch(ing)up” on all the Wienermobile news. As corny as it was, it was one of the great bonding moments in our wacky family history and a reminder that sometimes the most valuable moments are not extravagant trips to Disneyland.

But rather simple ones we can truly “relish” together.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Family, Hadley, Humor, Jamie, travel

How An Innocent Pep Rally Can Invokes Future Child Humilation

September 21, 2009 By

Hadley will not graduate from high school until 2022.

This blatant reminder of my advancing age was reinforced at a pep rally held by our local high school cheerleaders. Kindergartners from six feeder elementary schools gathered to applaud the Wildcats and receive their very own Class of 2022 T-shirts to wear the next day as they walked our local harvest festival parade route.

Parents were encouraged to participate and, if they were pulling wagons, to decorate those as well.

It was then something very ugly was triggered. Something that I did not know even existed in the deep recesses of my mind. Some would call it school spirit. Others would call it obnoxious parents who go overboard.

You see, I was always highly competitive in sports but I wouldn’t say I had a lot of school spirit. Who could blame me? Our junior high mascot was a hippo. It’s tough to get psyched when someone calls you a barrel-shaped artiodactyl mammal.

The emergence of Said School Spirit came with a complication: READ ON

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Colorado, Hadley, Humor

Inquiring minds want to know: does the Tooth Fairy have a criminal record?

September 14, 2009 By

Haddie lost her first tooth on Labor Day.

I’ll admit it: my initial thought was not about this fun milestone but rather, I was horrified to think her teeth were rotting out.

After recommitting myself to do a better job at brushing, I turned to more important matters: what to do about the Tooth Fairy.

I was a believer. Jamie was not. From the get-go, his parents told him the Tooth Fairy wasn’t real.

I’m sure they also boiled the Easter Bunny just like on Fatal Attraction and arrested jolly old men wearing a red suit for trespassing.

I’m in the camp where I think it’s fun to play along with these traditions. So much of my childhood magic centered around believing. Of course, it can get taken too far but pimping up a fairy that appears in the night to leave you money?

Sign me up.

Jamie agreed to play along with everything. We had a problem, though: there was no physical evidence of the missing tooth because she likely swallowed it. I posted a query to my Facebook friends about what to do and their responses were very helpful.

Before bedtime, I sat down with Hadley and we wrote a note to the Tooth Fairy explaining our situation. One of my FB friends suggested we also leave the Tooth Fairy a glass of water so she could sprinkle her magic fairy dust that was the same color as her dress.

I loved the idea.

We put Haddie to bed and I started scrounging around for some money. I firmly believe less is more when it comes to setting expectations so I did not want to leave more than $1. Problem is I only had a $10 bill and lots of change. I knew Haddie would deem the tooth fairy a cheapskate if I went the latter route so I went door-to-door begging for a dollar bill.

Funny thing is, none of my neighbors seemed too surprised to see me doing this.

Once Haddie was asleep, I slipped into her room, left a note from the tooth fairy and $1. As for the fairy dust, I had a stroke of brilliance. She is absolutely obsessed with the color yellow and I thought she would be THRILLED to think the tooth fairy wore a dress that very color.

The only thing I hadn’t anticipated is that it would look like the tooth fairy left her very own urine sample.


When Haddie found it in the morning, she naively sniffed it and said, “Yeah, it smells like water.”

Just don’t be surprised if you hear of any news reports about the Tooth Fairy being arrested for lewd conduct.

Do you let your children believe in the Tooth Fairy? If so, how much do you leave for each tooth?

P.S. Mile High Mamas, be sure to checkout my synopsis of the fantastic party I threw with Mom It Forward last week. It’s not every day your party-goers jump in the pool fully clothed!

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Hadley, Humor

Our Labor Day Weekend…

September 9, 2009 By

…started with our annual pilgrimage to hike St. Mary’s Glacier.

It ended before we even began.

Upon arriving at the trailhead, the only parking that remained was along a steep ledge so I hopped out to guide Jamie in his parallel parking efforts. Hadley, assuming we had arrived, jumped out too.

While it was still moving.

She started shrieking. I raced over to her side of the car and found her arm caught in the door. I released it, only to realize that was the least of her problems: Jamie had stopped the car on her foot.

“DRIVE, RIGHT NOW! DRIVE DRIVE DRIVE!!!!!!”

Rest assured, I am not a person you want to be around in a crisis situation.

Confused by my hysterics, Jamie paused, unsure what direction to go. Eventually, he just stepped on the gas and rolled off her poor little foot.

We grabbed little crippled Hadley and raced her to the back of our SUV. We removed her shoe and as we surveyed the damage, Bode (ever the supportive brother), came over and demanded, “I’m hungry. Feed me now.”

He will not be mistaken for the sensitive type.

Even though her foot was miraculously fine, we skipped the hike and hung out at nearby Silver Lake before heading down to play in Idaho Springs.

Dejected from our misadventures, I promised them we would go visit Grandma Jean’s kitties when we returned home. Our neighbor had somehow left the two people in the world her cats hate most (meaning: my children) in charge while she went away for the weekend.

They jubilantly raced across the street, I punched in the code Jean had given me to her garage door and entered.

Then the house alarm went off.

She hadn’t mentioned anything about a house alarm.

I didn’t stick around long enough to figure out how to turn it off. We hightailed it over to another neighbor’s house who came back and did it for us. We settled into kitty stalking mode and all was well in the world.

Until the cops showed up.

I’ll spare you the sordid details but they almost involved a preschooler and kindergartner doing hard time for catnapping (mug shots taken two years ago prior to our trip to Mexico. Oh, the foreshadowing.)

Oh yeah, and my dear husband who debated not vouching for us.

He was obviously still recovering from my near-nervous breakdown earlier that day.

I’ll stop there and won’t mention the freezer that was left open all night and how we woke up to all our nice, expensive meat oozing all over the floor, which then inspired possessed me to spend the entirety of my Labor Day cleaning out our garage.

Have I mentioned how glad I am the long weekend is over?

So, make me feel better. Tell me about all the horrible, awful things that happened to you over Labor Day weekend. Errr…. please?

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Hadley, holidays, Humor, Jamie, travel

Back-to-school revelries: in pictures

August 26, 2009 By

It is official: we survived our whirlwind summer and believe me, we were ready for it to be over. Our lazy summer afternoons were starting to look like this:


I am happy to say both children are tucked away in their respective schools. Of course, this deserves celebration and we’ve been doing our fair share of it around here.

It started with back-to-school night.

Bode is the blind boy in the sunglasses.

Then, it was a special steak dinner the night prior to school with Grandma and Grandpa, followed by father’s blessings and a fashion show with the new school outfits.


Of course, the first day of kindergarten is not complete without oatmeal cookie pancakes for breakfast.


And a few rock-star snapshots.


This excited girl is with her darling new teacher. Miss P. is a far cry from the crotchety old bitty Hadley was supposed to have (who, lucky for us, prematurely retired).


I am sure there will be a record number of eager fathers who will volunteer in the classroom this year.

Today was Bode’s first day of preschool. He woke up early, snuggled in bed watching Transformers, and then decided he would just as soon stay there all day. This school stuff, he explained, is for the Hadleys of the world.

Special breakfast and treatment? He didn’t really care.


Take 2: I like to entitle “Don’t wwwwweave me!”


But once in the classroom, the kid came to life. The teachers said he was so fun and well behaved.


As Jamie and I drove out of the parking lot after dropping him off, I let out a sob and in the same breath, sang “Freedom!!”

Jamie: “You sure made a quick recovery, didn’t you?”

I’ll be in therapy for two hours a day for the next nine months. Jamie would like me to spend it cleaning but in doing so, I would end up looking like this:


So you can find me here:


XOXOXO
A

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor, outdoors

Not to state the obvious….

August 19, 2009 By

Summer is winding down Chez Canuck. When I have a moment to come up for air (we have family visiting this week), I’ll be sure to write an overview of all our adventures.

And believe me, they are many.

In the interim, enjoy a few profundities from the kiddos.

=============================-

“Hadley, what were you doing in the backyard?”

“I was just burying worms, Mommy.”

“Oh. Well, it’s dinnertime. Can you please come in and wash up?”

“Why?”

“Um, because you were just burying worms.”

====================================

On Monday, we went to Bode’s bestestesetest friend Seanie’s birthday party. One of the main benefits of birthday parties is devouring your spoils afterward.

Hadley: “Hey, Bode. What’re you eating?”

Bode: “A sucker.”

Hadley: “Sounds good! What does it taste like?”

Bode: “A sucker.”

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Family, Hadley, Humor

Thumbing with the Devil

August 9, 2009 By

So, while my dear husband was holding down the fort at home as his pumpkin got pummeled by a tornado, find out what I were doing.

And just how much I was eating.

Note: This is not the actual size, which was about 10 times bigger.

READ ON

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Colorado, Family travel, Hadley, Humor, travel

Here fishy fishy, bye fishy fishy: share your fish “tales”

June 21, 2009 By

If there was a Social Services for Fish, we would be so busted.

I am sad to inform you that Tad, Rad and Cad met their demise, as well as those other unnamed fishes we managed to kill as well.

Total lifespan at the Johnson Slaughterhouse? A whopping 23 days. For the lucky ones.

For those just tuning in, my daughter Hadley received a fish tank for her 5th birthday from her Aunt Lisa. My husband Jamie and I had previously been resistant to acquiring a pet but thought fish ownership would be a no-brainer.

Turns out the Wizard of Oz’s scarecrow isn’t the only one without a brain.

We started with three fish and replaced them after each ceremonial burial around the toilet.
Tad met his demise in his Man Cave. Cad attempted the back-stroke and ended up staying there. A few others died when the filter broke. We flushed the last-standing fish down the toilet.

It was a mercy killing. He really had no other chance to survive.

We were not bad fish parents, really we weren’t. We fed them twice a day, cleaned the tank once a week and loved them the best we could. During our return trips to Pet Smart, we were interrogated each time. I get this. None of us want our lil’ fishes to end up in a watery grave. But sometimes they went a bit overboard such as when an employee would not sell us a goldfish because our 2-gallon tank “was too small for three fish.”

This, from the store that crams hundreds into one tank. Then again, I don’t ever see their fish floating belly-up.

Maybe theirs are just more proficient in the backstroke than ours.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Family, Hadley, Humor

It’s the simple things

June 10, 2009 By

The simple things have been making me so happy lately.

Like this girl’s final day of preschool.

Like watching these two marvel at nature’s splendor aboard the Georgetown Loop Railroad.


Like dancing for the pillars at Cheeseman Park.


Like John Schmidt’s inspiring piano performance Love Story (Taylor Swift) meets Viva La Vida (Coldplay). I have listened to this at least 100 times. If you have not watched this, please do. If you have already, listen again. It builds and inspires…and I get goosebumps every time.

Read the story here on KSL.

And last but certainly not least, I love children’s candor. When driving to the zoo last week, we had the following conversation:

Me: Who’s going to preschool next year?

Bode: ME!!!!!!

Me: Who’s going to kindergarten?

Hadley: ME!!!!!

Me: What’s Mommy going to do while you’re gone? I think I’ll just cry the whole time.

Hadley: No you won’t. You’ll be out hiking every day.

Busted.

© Crazy Bloggin’ Canuck–A Denver Mom’s Blog
Filed Under: Bode, Family travel, Hadley, Humor, outdoors
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