Happy Mother’s Day!

May 10, 2013 By

We’re in the home stretch before school lets out and I’ve been racing through writing deadlines, purging the house and holding a garage sale, field day, chaperoning Bode’s field trip to the aquarium, piano, Hadley’s 3-day camping excursion to a farm, wrapping up soccer and tennis, a long weekend in Colorado Springs, a father-son campout, a kick-off to summer potluck with a few friends and oh, did I mention I’m sick? Check on me after May 31 and you’ll be able to put a fork in me. Though at that point, I may opt for a knife.

With grandkids in the Outer Banks

Of course, Sunday is Mother’s Day and I’m so grateful for my mom. Around Christmas, we almost lost her and I can’t tell you how grateful I am that she pulled through. Growing up, she was always the life of the party, uber-talented domestically (cooking, crafts, sewing, you name it) and so cool my friends would come to hang out with her. She started selling her crafts on consignment in the area and was encouraged to showcase her talents by opening a successful tea room and gift shop. She was the reason people came for miles…she knew how to make people laugh and feel special. She has always had an admirable sense of fashion and was an amazing cook (hence the reason she opened a restaurant).

One of my favorite memories is when I was 16, she and her business partner took  her daughter and me to San Francisco. While they were at a gift show, my friend and I explored the city, after which the four of us rented a car and fell in love with the gorgeous coasts of Carmel and Monterey. On my recent visit to Calgary, I interviewed her about her colorful personal history of growing up on the farm in Southern Alberta..from cutting off chicken’s heads to funny stories about my grandparents who raised her. Truly, I come from such a wonderful legacy.

Her 25-year-long battle with her horrid disease has been a roller-coaster as it has ravaged her poor body and mind. A recent blessing she received gave some perspective on it–that the Lord views what she has gone through and continues to go through as a sacrifice. And she has had to give up so much of her former life that I know it kills such an independent spitfire like her. But through it all, she is so kind to her grandkids and does what she can with and for them and is so generous to my brothers and me.

I love you, Mom. Happy Mother’s Day!!!

XOXO

 

Filed Under: Family Tagged With:

On Raising Miss Independence

May 7, 2013 By

When did these kids of mine start growing up?

I admittedly couldn’t wait to get through the baby stage (a colicky, sleepless newborn will do that do you) but now that they are fun and thriving, I want to put the brakes on this whole growing up thing. Everywhere he goes, Bode sings and always has a smile on his face while Hadley’s growing self-confidence in her school work is making her happy and agreeable.

They are ready to start flexing their wings and I’m straining to give them more independence but it’s tough, even for a non-helicopter parent like me.

When we were in the mountains at YMCA of the Rockies last winter, we drove past their summer camp facility, Camp Chief Ouray. I described it to the kids–five days of new friendships, horseback riding, swimming, hiking, rope courses, field games, firesides, skits and more. They thought it sounded like the coolest thing ever and judging from the camp’s active alumni community and the fact it’s almost sold out, it is.

A couple of years ago, Hadley took her first solo flight to see Grandma in Utah and we’ve been promising Bode the chance to do the same thing. So, when we found out he needed to be 7 to go to camp (he’s a month shy), we decided to book him a flight.

Neither of my kids have ever been the hang-on-my-leg-begging-me-not-to-go types. Bode was more clingy when he was younger but now, they’re up for pretty much any adventure, anytime. And I’m so relieved they’re courageous and thriving.  (If you’re a helicopter-type, read this article about why playing and “helping” them actually hinders their creativity and development).

But sometimes I think I’ve done too good of a job of raising them to be independent.

I recently registered Hadley for Camp Chief Ouray and paid $175 for the additional horse camp option. She’s obsessed with learning to ride, lessons are expensive and the more affordable programs like Westernaires require parent volunteers to do menial tasks like mucking out stalls.

HELL, NO. (Can you tell I’m not a fan of horses?)

She was literally bouncing off the wall when I told her she was confirmed for horse camp and fired questions at me a million miles a minute. I was jealous and happy for her–I was a big fan of the Parent Trap and always wanted to go to camp as a kid. And then I got worried. Would she be OK? Would she miss us at all?

“Hadley, you’re not going to be homesick, are you?”

“Don’t worry about it, Mom. I’ll forget about you.”

She’ll never be mistaken for the sentimental type.

 

 

 

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor

Hanging with the big guns at 9News

May 6, 2013 By

The first Monday of the month is always a big one because that’s when my column comes out in The Denver Post and I usually do a segment on 9News to promote it. Here are the articles:

Hadley’s birth story (you may have seen it before).

Mother’s day gift ideas

Setting up Mother’s Day picks

But that was not the big news: some buff firefighters arrived to promote the latest Colorado Firefighter’s Calendar. I was dying to get a picture with them but they were taking forever in the studio and I would’ve had to fight off all the female employees who kept finding reasons to sneak onto the set.

And really, who can blame them.  It was one rough day on the job.

Filed Under: 9News, Humor

First Grade Academia Marvels

May 2, 2013 By

I’ve decided I want to raise a geek. Seriously. Other parents can have their popularity and cheerleading contests because I don’t want my kid to get caught up in that rat race. The nicest teenagers I know are the geeks–they’re smart, respectful, have a great group of supportive friends and go on to have successful careers.

Bode is turning into a little geek and I couldn’t be more proud. He loves learning. I bought him an interactive Intelliglobe for Christmas and that boy is constantly drilling me on my continents, populations and ecology with his globe’s 18 touch and explore features, trivia and multiple choice challenges. He’s also borderline obsessed with getting to the very end of Raz Kids with its interactive ebooks, downloadable books, and reading quizzes. And math. Don’t even get me started with math. Everything begins and ends with numbers.

I don’t remember a lot about first grade. I was still pretty cute (that quickly changed a couple years later) and I was madly in love with Phillip Cutler who later moved to Texas (oh, the heartbreak). And that I got a lot of nosebleeds. Beyond that, first grade was pretty much a wash.

Last week, Bode had his parent-teacher conference and he led us around his classroom showing us his various projects, playing a math game and reading. It’s amazing to see how much his writing has improved since the beginning of the year–from one-sentence paragraphs to multi-page essays. He’s thriving in all areas and only missed one answer on the state-wide standardized BEAR test.

Jamie, of course, had to give him a hard time about that.

For reading, he’s currently testing out at the same level as a second grader at the end of the year.

Jamie joked he could take next year off. That husband of mine thought he was the parent-teacher stand-up comedian. Bode’s teacher wasn’t that amused.

We were blown away by it all but the kicker was at the end. Bode has been working on a research project on an animal of his choice: sloths. He sat us down to show us the PowerPoint presentation he had prepared on the subject.

Things have changed a wee bit since I was in first grade.

Filed Under: Bode, Humor

Why I will not be going to beauty school

April 30, 2013 By

I’m Florida-bound today and will be checking out the Westin Cape Coral Resort at Marina Village for Travel Mamas. I committed to the trip before I realized one very important thing: I would be missing the kids’ piano recital. I am particularly remorseful because it is Bode’s first one.

Fortunately, Aunt Lisa came to the rescue, as per this email chain from yesterday.

Lisa: Jamie, I know that Amber is out of town this week, so I’m a little worried how Haddie is going to look for her piano recital (and Bode too but we can’t do much for him J ).  This is not to offend you but you are a guy (that’s true).  Let me know if you need any help and I can stop by your place before the recital.  Are you offended now?  I didn’t think so. lol

Jamie: I have never been offended by having less work to do.  Especially when it comes to girly stuff.  Feel free to swing on by.

Me: AMEN, Lisa. I sent Jamie an itinerary for the week and included on it for them to dress nicely for the recital. I was also worried about Bode going to school every day with bedhead without me there to comb it down so I took matters into my own hands and tried cutting it for the first time yesterday. Those two bald spots on the side of his head will hopefully grow back soon. #NoLie

Jamie: No joke.  Our neighbor asked what letters were carved into the side of Bode’s hair yesterday.  She asked, “is it a G?”   I then began to explain that Bode is a big fan of the Green Bay Packers and that it was a G that he requested on the side of his head.”

Lisa: Oh no.  We are not Green Bay Packers fans in this family.  I’ll go buy him a hat!!! lol

Jamie: Lol  #savebodeshead

Hair grows back, right?

And for the record, I shaved that “G” for Great, which is how he’s going to do at his first recital.

===

Video of Bode’s recital

Video of Hadley’s recital

Filed Under: Bode, Hadley, Humor

The Santa Reveal & End of an Imaginary Era

April 29, 2013 By

I’ve always believed it’s important to instill magic in my kids’ childhood and my husband and I have played along with the Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, Santa et. al. We’ve been careful to never put too much credence into them but my kids’ overactive imaginations have taken care of that.

End of an era: moments after finding out.

For Christmas, we’ve kept the Santa presents to a minimum and he only brings them a couple of their requested gifts and stuffs their stockings. Mostly because I want the credit to go to me, not some plump dude sporting fur.

Months ago, my 8-year-old daughter started building a leprechaun trap and I had forgotten about it until I heard her setting it up the night before St. Patrick’s Day. My first thought: Crap, now I have to do something so made up a few mischievous leprechaun tricks.

Last year, my daughter’s second-grade teacher introduced Elf on the Shelf (likely to ensure they behaved) and the children were delighted when, each day, their elf dreamed up a new caper.

Last month, we were at the airport on Easter waiting for our flight home from Utah when my daughter, while eating her stash of candy she’d collected earlier that day, asked,

“Mom, are you the Easter Bunny?”

“What do you think?”
“I think you are. No, wait, I think he’s real. Oh, I don’t know.”
“Do you want to know?”
“Maybe, I’m not sure. OK, yes I want to know.”
My husband had previously agreed we wanted to tell her everything this summer so the timing was perfect.
“Mommy and Daddy are the Easter Bunny.”

Disappointment, then relief flooded her face. She grabbed another handful of candy as she contemplated this new revelation. After a minute, she handed me a Reese’s chocolate egg (sharing is something she never does) and asked:

“What about Santa?”
“Do you really want to know?”
“Yes, no, maybe not.”

Learning the truth about Santa was exponentially tougher because there’s a lot more build-up and excitement surrounding him. Ultimately, she confessed,

“Yes, I want to know.”
“It’s Mommy and Daddy.”

There was a flash of sadness but then an appreciative look as she reflected back upon all the gifts we’ve bought her that have been attributed to Kris Kringle.

She grabbed another stash of candy, shoved it in my hand and queried.

“So, the Tooth Fairy and leprechauns. Not real, either?”

By now, my mouth was busting with her bribery chocolate and I merely nodded.

Once she had digested the new information, she got a twinkle in her eye and started calling me out.

“So, when the Tooth Fairy came when we were evacuated for Hurricane Earl, that was you?”
“Yep, and it was really tough one because we didn’t have any cash and had to borrow from Grandma and Grandpa.”

“And when I leave out those cookies and milk for Santa?”
“Daddy devoured them.”

“What about all those pistachios Elphina ate?” (Elphina was her Elf on the Shelf and one morning, my daughter found her bent over in a drunken-like stupor surrounded by shells).
“Daddy and I ate them.”

“But what about when we found her in the kitchen with all those sugar cookie crumbs? WERE YOU AND DADDY RESPONSIBLE FOR EATING THEM ALL?”
“Yep.”

Apparently, our imaginary friends have an eating problem we’ll need to come up with another scapegoat.

Filed Under: Hadley, Humor

Because it’s never too early to start corrupting the young

April 26, 2013 By

Hadley’s class is beginning a farming unit at school and they will be going on a three-day field trip to a farm in a couple of weeks. To help prepare, her teacher asked Jamie to come into her class to teach them about soil and giant pumpkin growing.

An entire hour to talk about pumpkins to eager young minds? He was IN.

I wasn’t planning to go but at the last minute, he told me he needed help transporting visual aids, one of which is Hadley’s plant that is already growing like gangbusters in its pot.

I took it out to the car, carefully placed it by my feet and buckled up.

Him: “Pick it up.”
Me: “Fine.” I put it on my lap.
Him: You’re not holding it correctly.” I change my pose, holding it closer.
Him: “It’s moving around. You can’t hold it like that.”
Me: “What is wrong with the way I’m holding it?!”
Him: “Holding the plant upside down is not considered the best way to do it.”
(In my defense, it was slightly tilted but stable.)
Me: “We’re in a moving car and I’m clutching it to my CHEST. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT?”
Him: “More.”

I didn’t know what I’d signed up for when I volunteered to be his assistant.

When we were walking to class, the criticisms continued until he finally took the plant. I don’t know how he did it but his entire upper body didn’t move as he walked.

Hadley was thrilled to have him and his hands-on presentation was well-received. He was the Pumpkin Man Incarnate. He dazzled them with stories, awed them with pictures of The Great Pumpkin and never has a talk on soil been so moving. Some of the kids couldn’t get enough–one boy even took a full page of notes and kept drilling him with questions. Others will be losing sleep about their parent’s crappy soil.

“I’m going to plant a pumpkin in our yard and not tell my mom,” said one little girl.

Another one wailed, “How do I know if I have enough nitrogen in my soil?”

“I send my soil to get tested but I’m sure your parents won’t want to do that,” Jamie replied.

“Can we give it to you so you can send it off?”

At the end of the day, The Pumpkin Man gave each kid their very own Dill’s Atlantic Giant Pumpkin Seed.

Judging from their reaction, it was better than the Magic Bean from Jack and the Beanstalk.

Filed Under: Humor, Jamie, pumpkins

And So the Giant Pumpkin Games Begin!

April 25, 2013 By

Grow room. Allegedly the legal kind.

Pumpkin season has begun Chez Johnson and after soaking the seeds via the paper towel method, they are nicely planted in their pots in our makeshift grow room. This year, Jamie is using a mixture of 65 percent ProMix BX, 10 percent worm castings and 25 percent Fox Farm’s Ocean Forest.

C’mon, you know you were wondering.

Jamie is also planning to grow giant watermelon and tomato plants because we want to make our backyard resemble Honey, I Shrunk the Kids even more.

This morning, Hadley’s teacher asked Jamie to come speak to the class about soil, seeds and gardening. An entire hour to preach the Pumpkin Gospel to inquiring, gullible minds? Talk about the best thing ever.

The other day, I caught him rummaging through our cupboard.

“What’re you looking for?” Me, trying to be helpful.

“A cup for storing my bacteria and fungus.”

Thus begins the season of It’s Better Not To Ask.

Follow Jamie’s pumpkin updates at denverpumpkins.com. Tune in here next time for all the details of when Jamie became a rock star for Hadley’s class.

Filed Under: Jamie, pumpkins

Quit Yer Sniveling and Go Play!

April 24, 2013 By

First things first: I am not a lover of late-April snow. Do I wish I was out riding my mountain bike I got tuned up a few weeks ago? Yep. Do I wish it had snowed when it was supposed to in January so I could have skied it? You betcha.

But here’s something I learned growing up in Canada: If you wait for perfect conditions to get outside and play, you’ll spend most of your life waiting.

After a meager winter, Colorado is in a drought and watering restrictions are in place. Coloradoans have been praying for moisture and the past few weeks we finally got it. We’re still not in the clear yet–snow pack is still below average. But instead of Hail Mary-ing the weather gods, my entire Twitter and Facebook stream have been full of whiners about the cold.

Ever undeterred by inclement weather and suffering from serious cabin fever, I bundled up, headed outside, breathed in the gorgeous crisp air, wandered to my  heart’s content and posted some pictures of my explorations and the following message on my social media networks:

“While my fellow Coloradoans were sniveling about the snow, I took a better approach.”

Shoveled sidewalk? I don’t need no stinkin’ sidewalk.

“A river runs through it.” The snow, that is.

I paused to pose by my kids’ favorite tree……and accidentally snapped this photo in the process.

I LOVE it and have entitled it “heaven.”

Because to live a healthy, active lifestyle, all you need to do is look up, get out, and embrace all four seasons, no matter what the conditions.

Just don’t check back with me in July when I’m whining about the 100-degree temperatures.

=====
The next couple of months, I’m going to be teaming up with Target and their C9 by Champion Women’s Active Wear line as I detail a few of my many outdoor adventures–a match made in heaven!

Filed Under: Colorado

Battling Out the Glory Days

April 23, 2013 By

Bode recently started soccer for the spring. He has been with the same group of boys for a few years so it’s always a joyous reunion when a new season rolls around. He is a solid player and usually scores every game because he’s really good at ball handling and dribbling.

What he is not good at? The Big Kick (as Jamie calls it). We found that out the hard way when his coach held him back as the Sweeper, whose primary job is to belt the ball upfield. Little dude would try to just dribble the ball past his attackers and it often backfired on him.

Thank goodness they’ll start to play on a bigger field with real positions soon. That kid has “forward” written all over him.

We recently went out for Chinese food and were trying to explain to Bode all the different positions in soccer with (what else?) sugar packets.

The problem with this is whenever we try to talk strategy, Jamie and I disagree on our old glory deals. Jamie boasts what a scoring machine he was and I always assert my soccer career was much more glorious than his (competitive, much?) with my near-foray onto Alberta’s provincial team before my busted ankle. Blah, blah, blah.

As we were battling it out in front of Bode, I told him, “I was center-mid. They called me “The Rover” because I was just so good I followed the ball wherever it went.”

Jamie interjected, “It is also called ‘being out of position.’”

 

 

Filed Under: Bode, Humor, Jamie
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