I never fancied myself a ballerina, which is particularly ironic since I’m walking on my tiptoes a lot these days. And also on eggshells.
My 21-month-old Bode has transformed almost overnight from a loving, cuddly, easy-going angel to an often possessed, tantruming toddler. Of course, I know I should have expected that such bliss could not last.
I remember shortly after my daughter Hurricane Hadley turned 3 she went through a phrase I called The Tyrant. When I offered suggestions for a snack, I braced myself for the unleashing of how dare I even suggest something so unthinkable as apples. When I pretended to turn her into a princess with my magic wand, I was sent to the dungeons because I held the wand at the wrong angle. Anything set her off, which made me wonder if she had some kind of chemical imbalance.
Or if it was the fact that she was 3.
I’ve heard from some that the 3s are worse than the 2s. Doubting Thomas that I was, I didn’t buy in. But then there I was: sold out.
We had one uncharacteristically good day with what I would consider to be a reasonable amount of T.O.N. (Tantrums Over Nothing). We were sitting on our leather sofa watching out the window for my husband Jamie to come home. I looked down at how precious she was being and decided she needed some positive reinforcement.
“You know, Mommy is so happy with how sweet you’ve been today. Thank you for being so nice to your brother Bode and me.”
Within seconds, seconds people, she started acting up and it did not stop the rest of the night.
As we were eating dinner, she miraculously downed most of the curry chicken phyllos I made and I decided again: positive reinforcement.
“Haddie, what a great eater you’re being tonight!”
Within milliseconds, milliseconds people, she choked out her food and spewed it all over the floor. Jamie looked at me dubiously.
“Hey Amber. Here’s a new parenting strategy for you. How about ditch this positive reinforcement crap and STOP WITH THE COMPLIMENTS.”
We’ll begin our book tour next month.
I'm a Canadian-born mom of two, former Denver Post columnist, family travel writer, editor of MileHighMamas.com and 9News contributor. Expert on all things Utah, Denver, family and travel. Lover of laughter and life. Happily married to a man obsessed with growing The Great Pumpkin. 