An important facet of Mormonism is we believe marriages are eternal. Yep, that’s right, people. That dude you wake up to every morning with the rock-star hair? You’d better make sure he’s “the one” because you’ll be with him for this life and the next.
Though for Jamie, his decision was put in question when I woke up looking like this on a backpacking trip shortly after we got married.
Mormons do a great job at marriage because family is at the very core of our beliefs. Husband and wife are “sealed” together in the temple and children are born “in the covenant,” meaning our bond is not “‘Til death do you part.” It’s a cherished doctrine, one that gives me resolve to build the very best relationship possible and perspective that when a loved one dies, it is not the end.
What Mormons don’t do well? Throw weddings.
If you’ve never been to an LDS wedding, you’re not missing much. I’m not here to get anyone’s knickers in a twist but honestly, Mormon weddings are lame. The temple part, is of course, glorious, but what unfolds thereafter? Lame.
I’m not sure why, as a culture, we fail in this particular area. Maybe it’s because LDS couples marry young and weddings are expensive? Or is it that we’re so entrenched in tradition that we just can’t think outside of the box?
I’m certainly not here to condone spending thousands of dollars on a wedding. But here’s the simple fact: the majority of LDS celebrations are held in our church’s cultural hall. As in the gymnasium. I don’t care what an amazing decorator you are: basketball hoops can only look so good in crepe paper.
The evening generally consists of going through the line to small-talk with Uncle What’s-his-face, congratulating the happy couple, eating some finger foods and finishing it off with the cake. If you’re (not) lucky, the extended family will perform a talent show of some kind.
Believe me, not all Mormons perform like them thar Osmonds.
See what I’m saying?
Even if you have a tight budget, there are ways to pull together a great wedding. My husband’s sister had her reception in the grove of trees behind our local church and it was glorious–white lights, glowing lanterns, delicious food. All very her, classy and on a tight budget.
But I have simply fallen in love with this glorious LDS bike wedding:
Derek and Rebecca said in the invitations that there would be physical exercise and to wear comfortable clothing. But they didn’t tell everyone that they would be going on a progressive party around downtown LA on bikes! After the temple ceremony everybody walked around the corner and saw that there were rows and rows of rented bicycles. It was so exciting! Everyone spent some time decorating their bicycles, then we took off. The first stop was a picnic lunch at a park, the second was a stop in at the LA institution, Diddy Reese and the last stop was for toasts at a botanical garden.-Jordan Ferney
This wedding was so charming it was featured on Martha Stewart Weddings (seriously, you need to go see the entire slide show).
So, I’ve put it out there and will assuredly get a fair share of hate mail from angry brides professing their cultural hall wedding “was the very best day of my life!” I don’t dispute that in the least and to each their own.
I just wish I’d thought to do skis instead of bikes.
Note: After posting this, I have received an exorbitant amount of emails with LDS-related questions. Be sure to check out the fun feature I did a few years ago, LDS-Palooza, that answers every question you never thought to ask your friends, The Mormons.
I'm a Canadian-born mom of two, former Denver Post columnist, family travel writer, editor of MileHighMamas.com and 9News contributor. Expert on all things Utah, Denver, family and travel. Lover of laughter and life. Happily married to a man obsessed with growing The Great Pumpkin. 